I'm a man in my early 30s earning a little over ¥10 million a year. I’m fairly confident in my looks, and I’d like to get close to women in their 40s. Is the going rate for an allowance about the same as it is for women in their 20s? I’m a little worried about the financial side and was wondering if it might be slightly cheaper, haha.

I’m Meg, a female member. Thank you for taking an interest in women in their 40s. Please feel free to contact us outside the club. There are many mature women waiting for questioners who are confident in their looks. To everyone: I’m sorry for subjecting you to that yesterday. I definitely wasn’t drinking. When she can’t see her beloved husband this much, even Meg-chan seems to start getting a little rough around the edges. We’re basically just pen pals now. Damn you, COVID. > I like kind captains♪ > A Madonna? You’re too kind (tears) > I’ll keep working hard toward becoming a Romanée.

Maezawa from the Corporate Planning Office here as well. The moment someone says they’re confident in their own looks, I can’t help but wonder, “Do they really understand the situation?” It only makes me feel uneasy. That said, a woman in her 40s is likely to have plenty of life experience and know what she wants. Of course, everyone wants money, but I think some people are looking for more than just the financial side of things. Some may be seeking an emotional or human connection, while others may be looking for an adult relationship (intimate). If you’re the kind of man who matches what she’s looking for, she may be willing to be somewhat flexible. There are plenty of kind and wonderful women out there. However, any man who says, “You’re in your 40s, so I’ll pay less,” is obviously no gentleman. Men who go on about the going rate are no good either. First, tell her that you genuinely want to continue seeing her. If you’re only saying it superficially, she’ll see through you right away. It’s meaningless unless you say it to someone you truly want to keep dating. If she feels that your feelings are genuine and comes to feel the same way, there may be room to discuss the allowance. That said, saying you want to keep seeing her from the very first meeting probably won’t sound very credible, so I think it’s better to pay a little more than usual, even if it means stretching yourself. After paying the same amount on the second meeting as well, it would be natural to bring up the idea that you’d like to continue seeing her. Of course, love at first sight does happen, and as men gain more experience, many become able to tell from the first meeting whether they’re compatible with someone—at least in terms of how they feel about her. So there’s nothing wrong with bringing up a continuing arrangement from the first meeting either, but…

I’m Flag Maker, a column writer. If you simply offer a woman in her 40s a low allowance, she’ll probably think, “Oh, he’s offering me less than the going rate.” Things like that are immediately obvious. Some women may even find it unpleasant. So I think it’s important, at the very least, to explain why the allowance is low and politely ask for her understanding. For example, you could carefully explain the various reasons why you’re offering a lower allowance, then say something like: “But I’d really like to somehow start seeing someone as wonderful as you. Would you please consider it? m(_ _)m” It kind of sounds like an apology to your wife after an argument, haha. I actually just apologized to my wife recently, explaining why I had said and done the things that caused our argument, promising never to do it again, and asking her to somehow continue our married life together. “Please, m(_ _)m” Haha. Anyway, if you honestly ask without trying to hide anything, there may be women who won’t take offense and will agree. Some women may even feel happy being asked by a younger man.

I’m Kamihikoki, a male member. It doesn’t sound like you need to join the club just yet. Papa-katsu isn’t a drug, of course, but once you enter that world, it may be surprisingly hard to get out. For now, I think you should continue enjoying spending time with women freely. Wait, are you already a member of a club…? As for women in their 40s, given the questioner’s age, you’d almost certainly be very welcome—no, more like they’d be thrilled. Actually, to be precise, they might simply be surprised… Apparently, if the age gap is too large, the woman may feel bad about it, making it difficult for a papa-katsu arrangement to continue. Unless you’re very careful not to make her feel uncomfortable, maintaining the relationship may be challenging. There are apparently plenty of offers from older men in their 60s and 70s, and the allowances seem to be higher too. But it seems things aren’t necessarily that way, so I think the amount you have in mind should be perfectly acceptable.