This question is based on the premise that I don’t normally act according to these thoughts and only express my true feelings in the question box. I’m afraid this may come across as rude, and I’m sorry if it makes you uncomfortable.

I’m Marika, a female member. I feel much the same way as Papuwa-san. I can’t kiss or go on dates with someone I don’t like. I’m happy to have dinner, be physically satisfied, and receive an allowance, and I’m grateful to the men I meet. Honestly, I’m impressed that you’ve managed to keep it going without being found out, despite disliking it that much. That said, please think carefully about whether the money is really worth going that far for. I hope you’ll reconsider living within your means and building a life of your own.

Maezawa from the Corporate Planning Office here as well. > Do men who say things like this really believe, deep down, that I’m the kind of woman who genuinely likes kissing and is compatible with them? I don’t think they believe it deep down, exactly, but they do see you as that kind of woman. That just shows how convincing and realistic your acting is. There are all kinds of women out there. When it comes to a transactional relationship, some women may say that H is okay, but kissing is only for someone they genuinely like, so that’s off-limits. Others may say F is out of the question. Compared with women like that, when you agree to it, men may start thinking, “Could it be…?” I think it’s impressive that you’re able to draw that line clearly and respond accordingly. That’s why men mistake your acting for genuine feelings and end up thinking you’re a wonderful woman. There are also women who make no sounds and barely move at all during H. Even women may find it hard to believe that such people exist, but they do—and from a man’s perspective, it can be a major disappointment. In that respect too, you probably make it seem as though you genuinely enjoy being intimate. Because your performance is so convincing, the man may simply assume that you either really like that sort of thing or that the two of you have particularly good chemistry. Perhaps the man you’re seeing simply doesn’t have much experience yet and can’t tell the difference. Or maybe your acting really is that convincing. Either way, if you accept that men are just like that and respond accordingly, it may help keep your stress levels down. Also, if you let too much stress build up, you could end up breaking down, so please take care of yourself. Rest when you’re tired, and start again once you feel ready. It would be a shame if forcing yourself too much made intimacy difficult even with someone you genuinely came to like.

I’m Column Writer Flagmaker. From the man’s perspective, there’s always this lingering worry that the woman might not actually like being with him. Because of that anxiety, I think men generally fall into two categories: ① Once she accepts his allowance and agrees to an adult relationship (intimate), he takes that as a sign that she doesn’t dislike him. But he still feels insecure and wants the reassurance of hearing it clearly, so he seeks her agreement with comments like, “We’re compatible, right?” or “You like me, don’t you?” ② He never asks those kinds of questions. He simply behaves courteously and avoids doing anything that might make her dislike him, gradually easing his own fears that she may not actually be comfortable with him. Even people in category ② still carry that anxiety deep down the whole time, though. ^^ I don’t think lying or deceiving someone is necessarily bad if it makes them happy. So rather than taking a passive approach, why not take the initiative and “deceive” her a little yourself?

I’m Meg, a female member. Honestly, I think this pretty much represents what almost all PJ women are thinking... I’ve been looking at Twitter, and it’s full of some truly horrifying posts. Compared to those, you, dear questioner, are being incredibly polite. If all men were that stupid, anyone would eventually blow up. Kissing and all that? Seriously, no way! They just don’t get it, do they? (￣▽￣) That said... Not every man is like that. There are also men who can really make you feel at ease. If you keep forcing yourself to lie this much, it’s going to become incredibly exhausting, don’t you think? It may be difficult to turn someone down at a time like this, but it might be worth reconsidering. Otherwise, as Mac suggested, the best thing is probably to change your mindset. > “For now, I’m going with younger men... teehee.” You clever girl, you sound like you’re having a great time! ♪

I’m Date◎Yume, a male member. Some people may consider it rude, but I think most people would be fine with it. Everyone—men and women alike—is trying to be considerate at first, and I imagine they exchange a polite phrase or two. I think both men and women can generally get a sense of what the other person is like from their attitude at the time. So I don’t think you need to worry too much. And if you’re uncomfortable, it’s perfectly fine to turn them down. No matter the situation, you shouldn’t force yourself. I hope we can all enjoy this with room to spare in both our hearts and our wallets. “I’ve chosen to take part in this kind of activity myself, and since the men are also people with positions and responsibilities, I imagine they’re tired from not having anywhere to let their guard down or relax.” ↑ Everything comes down to this phrase, doesn’t it? It’s a very good way of putting it（笑） Everyone involved understands this and takes part on that basis. P.S. Ahaha（笑） Kamihikōki, are online dates really that great?（笑） If I get turned down too, I might consider trying an online date next time（笑）

I’m Hikouki, a male member. From a woman’s perspective, this is basically a fairly well-paid job, so there’s a lot she has to put up with. I think your wording is perfectly natural. It comes across as gentle, without any harshness. As long as the man’s sense of satisfaction and the woman’s allowance (compensation for what she has to put up with) are both being fulfilled, you could say that each person’s needs have been met. > When men say things like this, do they genuinely think I’m someone who likes kissing and whose personality is compatible with theirs? Or are they enjoying something simulated, knowing that the woman is only acting? Basically, men can’t tell when women are acting. They misunderstand it. Women can’t tell when men are acting, either. When a woman says, “We’re sexually compatible,” the man may not actually feel that way. Sometimes he may even feel the exact opposite. (He just won’t say it out loud.) P.S. Date◎Yume, Mac, Flagmaker, and Meg— I ended up making 18 online offers in just three days. Then I was asked to write about it anonymously on a blog, and several posts had already been written about it. People started asking, “Wait, are you Paper Airplane? Even in the column?” So I decided to write about the online experience in the column as well… The effect of meeting online is incredible. With a typical arranged date, the woman knows nothing about the man—not even his face or voice. But with online contact, that anxiety is gone. Surprisingly, there’s such a huge difference from the moment you meet that it almost feels like the effect of an aphrodisiac! Before meeting, you’ve already exchanged messages on LINE, talked on the phone, and seen each other face-to-face. The difference from a regular date is unmistakable. It’s honestly astonishing. It’s almost as if the woman has already experienced foreplay, and from the moment you meet… well, maybe. With a regular date, you might miss out on this, but after meeting online, the excitement on both sides just keeps building… About one in ten women immediately gets completely drawn into a world that goes beyond the usual club encounter. In a previous Q&A, I said that at an arrangement club, the woman treats it as work and the man as a customer, and that both continue pursuing their goals through money. But if both people already feel something from the moment they meet, then what kind of world—or state of mind—is that? I’m simply amazed by this new discovery brought about by the online effect. P.P.S. Mac— That’s an incredibly original idea. Since you can exchange LINE IDs right away and switch to a phone call, phone sex might be possible… although I don’t know whether the other person would be willing to do it.