Tips
Jan 31, 2020 00:16
4 answers
🏅 あなたの味方
お役に立てれば幸いです。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe staff
Maezawa from the Management Planning Office here as well.
> Pressuring her by demanding to know why she wouldn’t leave the club
Even simply asking her to withdraw violates the club’s rules, so that alone makes him an unsuitable man for Universe Club.
If he went so far as to pressure her, she had probably already been gently avoiding the subject several times beforehand. He failed to notice that and ultimately pressed her about it, which I suspect is what brought the relationship to an end.
From her perspective, even if they repaired the relationship now, she probably sees him as the kind of man who would do the same thing again a few months later. Once you’ve been labeled that way, it’s extremely difficult to go back to how things were.
This time, the best thing to do is give up.
But if you really can’t let go, then first, start seeing other women as well—at least two.
Once your feelings for that woman become comparable to what you feel for the new women, your current feelings will be reduced to about one-third. When they’ve faded that much, your feelings toward her will probably settle down to a normal level.
Then, if possible, you could try reaching out again in about a year. If she says she doesn’t want to meet one-on-one, perhaps you could invite another woman and have dinner as a group of three.
There may be other approaches if you think it through, but with your feelings as intense as they are right now, it would be far too frightening for her.
The priority is to first bring your feelings down to a normal level.
Strong feelings can be scary.
Other
I’m Saito, a column writer♪
I believe that learning not to fixate on one person is itself a form of personal growth.
You can either grow enough to move on to the next person, or grow into someone who won’t repeat the same mistakes again.
This may sound harsh, but while you’re dwelling on your worries, other men are steadily working on themselves and growing.
That’s true whether it’s work or romance.
🏅 ４０歳でリアル異世界転生したオッサン l 元金融マン → 現ＡＩ界隈
出張ホストの実技試験合格してるので、対女性への無難な前戯とかマナーに一定の知見あり。
Age: 40s
👨 Male
Universe member
I’m Flagmaker, a columnist.
So that’s what it was about. What scares me is that “caring about the other person” is actually more about your own needs than theirs.
Before things take a turn for the worse, I think it would be in your best interest to channel that self-centered affection into something like bonsai, and withdraw from the club.
🏅 倶楽部女性のご主人様に潤いを！
Mパパ、永遠の交際継続中！
B1タイプ〜A寄りパパです！
会う度大人は嫌と感じる方………ご相談ください。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe member
I’m Paper Airplane, a male member.
What a strange question.
Would someone who can afford to keep providing a substantial allowance without any adult relationship really grill her like a stalker? Is she about to die?
A woman who’s good at receiving that much money would probably be good at brushing off that kind of questioning too, wouldn’t she? You’d think she’d be able to dodge it—or even play it better and keep raising the amount she receives.
Besides, the previous question was obviously impossible from the start, and this is supposedly a follow-up to that? There’s no way anyone would think that, right?