I’m considering a monthly arrangement of 300,000 yen, meeting two or three times a month. Until now, it was 100,000 yen per meeting, but after we discussed making it a fixed arrangement, he suddenly became cold. Right from the first month, he rejected every date I suggested and insisted on a monthly arrangement, which feels strange. His reasoning is that since he said it would be a fixed arrangement, he should naturally pay even if we can’t meet. I’m torn between simply going along with him and ending things. He says he likes me, so I do feel that things have been going well, but I can’t stop dwelling on the fact that none of the several dates I suggested work for him. Sorry for the long post, but what do you think he really thinks of me? Should I move forward with the monthly arrangement? Is it okay to continue things as they are? I’d appreciate some tough, honest opinions from male members with experience and female members as well.

I’m a male member, BB7. She’s almost ridiculously easy to read—an idiot, perhaps? lol I’m surprised that women like this actually exist, and equally surprised that some men find them attractive. This may sound harsh, but please work on your ability to judge women a little more so you don’t get taken in by a piece of trash like her.

Maezawa from the Corporate Planning Office here as well. Why not try switching back to pay-per-meeting? You could simply say that you had intended to meet three times a month, but since she seemed busy and you weren’t able to meet, you thought it would be better this way. I think many women prefer a monthly arrangement, but with a sincere woman, you may hear something endearing like, “What should we do if we can’t meet that many times?” (Though perhaps there aren’t many people that sincere.) It seems women are more motivated to go on dates when it’s pay-per-meeting. I think it’s better to make it a fixed arrangement once she reaches the point where she naturally wants to go on dates and see you, rather than feeling she has to force herself to make the effort.

I’m Adventure Merchant, a columnist. Yeah, I understand how you feel. I often switched to a fixed monthly arrangement relatively early on. At first, we’d agree on something like, “Let’s meet about X times a month for ¥___.” But once things actually started, most of the time we couldn’t meet that often. Here’s an especially bad example. There was a period when I had three women on fixed monthly arrangements at ¥300,000 each. (So I was putting ¥900,000 a month into this…) The agreement was that I’d meet each of them three times a month. However, none of them was able to coordinate their schedules very well, and there was even one month when the total time I spent with all three women combined was less than an hour. Of course, there wasn’t even enough time for an adult relationship (intimate) either… Women will tell you they “like you.” Well, if they can get hundreds of thousands of yen for talking for just a few dozen minutes, of course they will… So I think fixed monthly arrangements carry some risk. That said, switching from pay-per-meeting to a fixed monthly arrangement can reveal a woman’s true nature—or rather, how she views the support she receives from a man. For example, if you were supposed to meet three times in a month but only met once, would she offer to refund two-thirds of the allowance? Would she show up in good condition when you meet? You can use things like this to judge whether she’s someone you should continue seeing. No matter how close you become, you still expect a certain level of consideration, right…? One woman I had on a monthly arrangement kept failing to match my schedule. When we finally managed to set a date, she canceled at the last minute without contacting me because she was hungover. I wasn’t even angry anymore（笑） So, if a woman on a fixed monthly arrangement gives you a bad feeling, I think it’s better to cut ties with her right away.

I’m Flag Maker, a column writer. If you enjoy doing whatever you’re told, I think it’s fine to continue as things are. But if it’s bothering you, it might be better to end the relationship ^^; Or you could try going along with him once, see what kind of reward you get, and then decide whether to continue.

I’m Date◎Yume, a male member. I also think it would be best for you to end things.

I’m Hikōki, a male member. As Mac mentioned, there’s a very high chance she was an ATM-type woman. Just as the advice in the Q&A suggested, I once ended up meeting one myself. I paid her upfront and assumed I’d never hear from her again. Then, after a little while, she set up our next appointment—only to cancel at the last minute. That same day, she sent me her bank details and said, “You’re the only person I can ask…” You’ve got to be kidding me… She only said that because I was the one she could get away with asking. When I turned her down, she said: “I’ve caused you trouble, so please let’s end things here…” Why is she the one saying that?? As far as I was concerned, I’d already considered the upfront payment a severance payment, and she was free to do whatever she wanted with it. I really understood what the more experienced members had been advising, and I’ve stopped paying everything upfront—or handing over a huge amount at the first meeting. P.S. Paying 100,000 yen… From her perspective, it was practically like I was covering the share of the other men too.