Is joining a dating club incompatible with being a gentleman?

I’m Flag Maker, a column writer. If a man has money, is well-mannered, and treats women kindly, then he’s a gentleman—even if he plays around a lot or is having an affair. It may sound strange, but there’s no contradiction lol.

I’m BB7, a male member. I suppose the real question is: What does it mean to be a gentleman in the first place?

Maezawa from the Corporate Planning Office here as well. That’s a pretty interesting question. Even if joining a dating club could be considered ungentlemanly, there’s no problem as long as all your other actions are gentlemanly. The only rule is that you’re expected to behave like a gentleman while using the club. If you act with that in mind—considering whether your behavior toward the women is gentlemanly—you shouldn’t receive any complaints and should be able to enjoy your time. That said, I don’t think it’s accurate to say that people who join dating clubs aren’t gentlemen.

I’m Adventure Merchant, a columnist. A dating club is a place where men and women pursue relationships on the premise that money is involved. Because finances are part of the relationship, I suppose some people might see it as ungentlemanly. However, I don’t interpret it by putting an excessive spotlight on the financial aspect. For example, imagine a married couple where the wife is a homemaker and the husband gives her money each month for living expenses and personal spending. A financially well-off man supports a woman. And, of course, if she doesn’t want to marry him, she has no obligation to do so and is free to say no. To me, this isn’t all that different from relationships formed through a dating club. In a dating club, a financially well-off man supports a woman. If she doesn’t want to pursue the relationship, she has no obligation to do so and is free to decline. That’s all there is to it. People often say that dating clubs operate on the premise that you don’t pursue “true love,” but I still don’t understand what exactly qualifies as true love. As you can probably see from the example above, true love doesn’t necessarily mean that there is no financial relationship involved. ※In a household with a homemaker, there is a financial relationship between the husband and wife. So if we say that true love begins only when the financial relationship disappears, it would seem to imply that many marriages in the world aren’t based on true love… In my view, the premise of dating clubs isn’t that people don’t pursue true love. The only real premise is that money is involved. Within that financially connected relationship, some men and women may value maintaining a casual, light, and transactional relationship. Others may want to pursue a serious romance that could eventually lead to marriage. I suppose that’s the difference. In an ordinary romantic relationship, money usually doesn’t become involved right away. In a dating club, it does from the outset. That’s all there is to it.

I’m だて◎ゆめ, a male member. The world is full of contradictions. The more deeply you think about it, the harder it becomes to know what really makes someone a gentleman, doesn’t it?（笑）

I’m Paper Airplane, a male member. As you said, men are full of contradictions. None of the women at the club seem to worry or say things like, “Is it really okay for me to be doing this?” the way someone might in an affair. I think joining the club allows both people to enjoy those otherwise-forbidden contradictions while fulfilling each other’s goals.