“Merry Christmas!” I messaged 12 women, and it’s been 24 hours, but only one of them replied, “Merry Christmas!” Does that mean I’m really just an unattractive older guy? (´･ω･)

I’m Saito, the columnist♪ Exactly. I think it’s the result of how you conduct yourself every day.

I’m a man in my 60s, feeling a little lost. When it comes to special occasions, I think older men should be more mindful that younger women may feel put off if they’re the ones initiating messages. Still, it’s wonderful that some women have replied to you! As for me, I don’t go on dates or send messages to the women I’m seeing. Some of them message me properly, while others don’t contact me at all. Either way, I really don’t worry about it. Let’s stay calm and unruffled!

I’m だて◎ゆめ, a male member. I suppose that’s just how it is. But if I send a message, I’d like them to reply (lol).

Maezawa from the Corporate Planning Office here as well. First, I’m curious about the fact that you sent it to 12 women. Normally, you’d probably send it to women you’re in a long-term arrangement with, so I would expect that number to be closer to three. In that case, there would be three people to whom you’d send a “Merry Christmas” message, and if they’re that kind of partner, I’d expect a reply 100% of the time. If you didn’t receive any replies this time, I suspect the reason is that you sent the message to women with whom you hadn’t actually developed a deep relationship. Of course, if you’re unusually in long-term arrangements with 12 women and meet every one of them at least once a month, then the above doesn’t apply at all. As for a man’s personal appeal, I think most papa-katsu partners don’t have much of it to begin with. The allowance makes up for that. You can probably tell by asking yourself whether they would continue seeing you without the allowance. That said, the allowance isn’t everything, so how you treat her during dates is also important. You should reflect on whether you were kind to her, noticed and complimented small changes in her appearance or mood, and generally handled the basic things properly. It’s also important to consider whether you were giving her the allowance she had asked for. Even if you felt it was sufficient, she may have been putting up with less than she wanted. If she was holding back, then it’s understandable that she didn’t reply. Still, if even one woman replied, I think you had built a good relationship with her. Next time, you could give her a New Year’s gift to make her happy and show her that you value her.

I’m Flag Maker, a column writer. I’d be too scared to send an email like that myself, lol. I probably wouldn’t get a reply either.

I’m a male member, Seattle. Let’s face it: older guys aren’t exactly expected to be attractive by default, so let’s both make an effort to show that we have something decent on the inside. About 90% of women are slow to reply, so if your message has no substance, you may not get a response at all.