I’m だて◎ゆめ, a male member.
This is where the unique nature of these relationships really shows—not only in dating clubs, but also in affairs and cheating relationships.
We should never forget that our relationships take place under such circumstances. I believe it’s important to treat each encounter as a once-in-a-lifetime meeting.
If you’ve been in touch and then suddenly hear nothing, you need to be prepared to calmly think, “Something must have happened.”
Maezawa from the Corporate Planning Office here as well.
> During times outside of dates
If it’s outside the date itself, then even if something happens, I think you have no choice but to accept it as fate and move on.
Even if you were able to find out, you wouldn’t be able to visit them in the hospital or do anything to help. Basically, there’s not much you could do.
That’s why I’m not really sure what the purpose of taking precautions would be.
I agree with Kamihikouki.
“I believe the rule is that neither person should interfere in the other’s life.”
It sounds like this is probably a pay-per-meeting arrangement, but to put it bluntly, you should accept that each meeting is a complete arrangement in itself.
As both men and women continue seeing each other, it’s only natural to start thinking, “I can count on this person.” But whether it’s your first date or your tenth, every arrangement eventually comes to an end.
With that mindset, the best approach is to use a dating club at a steady, regular pace.
I’m Hikokki, a male member.
Until you reach the point where you’re both comfortable revealing your identities, being able to lose contact with each other if something suddenly happens, or if one of you changes phones or LINE accounts, is actually important for building mutual trust.
In the questioner’s situation, even if you knew his identity, I don’t think there would be any way to have him transfer the allowance if something happened to you.
As the relationship grows more intimate, some people may even keep their supporter’s cash card so they won’t have to worry when they can’t meet. And if it becomes a long-term relationship, you’ll probably be able to build up some savings during that time.
Until mutual trust has been established and the relationship has really developed, I think the rule is not to interfere in each other’s personal lives.
As you become closer, you’ll naturally learn each other’s real names and addresses. Until then, I think it’s best not to pry.
If you want to find out his identity—or how he really feels about you—sooner, there are various ways you could go about it.
One quick method would be to ask him to take you to USJ and buy you an annual pass: “The pass will be issued using my ID, and since we’ll have to register it under the same surname and address like a married couple, you’ll need to tell me your name too.”
Or you could say, “I’m thinking about moving, so I want to look at apartments. Let’s go to a real estate agency together and submit a tentative application.” Then ask him to fill in the guarantor section of the application form.
If the relationship is going well, I think most men would be happy to go along with something like that.
And the fact that he’s willing to do those things would also be proof that he considers you very important.
