This is Saito, one of the column writers ♪
Thank you for enjoying the Q&A before joining.
I agree with what Maezawa-san said.
It may also be best to discuss it directly during your interview. Those kinds of consultations are taken into account in the comments as well.
I hope you find someone wonderful.
I’m in my 30s and new to the club.
As others have mentioned, some male members get discouraged or angry when they’re turned down with a C-type arrangement. It also seems unfortunate if complaints from male members make the club dislike you and eventually leave. Based on the impression I got from your question, I think B type would be the safer option.
Maezawa from the Business Planning Office here as well.
> I’m having trouble deciding whether to choose Type C or Type B.
Choosing Dating Type C doesn’t mean you have to accept every man’s invitation. The expected acceptance rate is around 50%.
If you’re comfortable accepting more than 80% of invitations, there’s Dating Type D. So, even as a Type C, you can turn down five out of ten men you go on dates with.
With that in mind, Type C is a perfect fit for you. However, some male members misunderstand how it works.
Some of them think, “It’s strange for a Type C woman to turn me down. That’s false advertising.”
Technically, they’re simply misunderstanding. If a man doesn’t want to be turned down after dinner, he should offer to a Type D woman instead. (Even Type D women have the right to say no, so you may still be turned down—and that’s perfectly fine.)
But because of a major misunderstanding, some men say nonsensical things like, “Type D feels too much like a sex service, so I don’t like it.”
Since Type C means a 50% acceptance rate, it’s perfectly normal to be turned down by one out of every two women. Yet some men develop this strange theory that they personally should never be rejected, and that any woman who turns them down must be misrepresenting her type.
That’s just self-centered thinking.
So, if you’re confident in your ability to handle it emotionally, Type C is clearly the right choice for you. But if you’re not confident, choosing Type B would probably be the safer option.
> If I choose Type C, I can’t turn someone down in that way, right? How can I refuse without upsetting him?
If you say, “I’m considering an adult relationship after the second date,” the staff will understand that you’re declining, but the man will think you’ve misunderstood the system. So that wording isn’t a good idea.
It’s a difficult one, but you could say something like:
“I’m sorry, but I don’t feel ready today.”
However, many men won’t simply take no for an answer. In that case, you could say:
“Would you be willing to meet me one more time? I’ll decide then.”
That way, you can end the meeting for the time being, and later say something like:
“I’ve given it a lot of thought since then, but…”
and use that as your reason for declining.
The man may not like it, but if you can’t leave otherwise, I think it’s understandable.
If you decide to choose Type B, you could tell the staff during your interview:
“I’d like to choose Type C, but I’m worried that turning people down might be difficult. Would it be okay to choose Type B instead? I feel more like a Type C.”
They may then note in your profile that you’re “a Type B who leans toward Type C.”
I’m Date◎Yume, a male member.
I also think Type B would be a good choice.
Rather than focusing on the relationship type, I think it’s better to consider what kind of arrangement you’d like to pursue after meeting someone.
Do you want to meet a lot of people, focus on quality, or aim for both?
You should also think about whether you’ll be able to handle that approach. I’d recommend deciding on a general strategy for how you want to go about things before attending the interview.
You can discuss the finer details during the interview, I think.
