I'm a female member with Dating Type B. I couldn't imagine having an adult relationship from the first meeting, so I chose B. However, when I received a new offer from a male member, his notes said things like, “I'm open to taking things further after dinner.” Since I’ve been a member for almost a month and had never been invited to have an adult relationship from the first meeting, I was worried about how to turn him down. Also, although I had marked the days I was available on the calendar and had even detailed the days and times I could meet in my comments, he requested a day when I wasn't available, so I declined. However, I received another offer from the same man today. Part of me felt happy, thinking, “Is he really that interested in me even after I turned him down once?” and that meeting someone can be a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, so maybe he’s actually a nice person. On the other hand, I’m worried about what I would do if he invited me to have an adult relationship, and I’m afraid he might be the kind of person who doesn’t read my comments beforehand and tries to impose his own schedule. If you were in my position, what would you do? Sorry for the long post.

I’m Saito, a columnist♪ You should turn him down. You need to face reality: there won’t be any wonderful times ahead.

I’m Date◎Yume, a male member. If you’re confident in unarmed combat such as karate or judo, following Maesawa-san’s instructions would probably make for a fun date（笑）. I can easily picture the scene and it’s getting me excited（笑）. I’d definitely recommend retraining your defensive counterattacks and giving it a try. However, if the male member you’re meeting is an even greater expert, you might end up having to say, “I give up!” So you’ll need to be prepared. If unarmed combat isn’t really your strong suit, it might be better to take an approach like Romane-san or Papua-san.

Maezawa from the Corporate Planning Office here as well. Men who write, “I’m open to pursuing a relationship after dinner,” are men who have previously received complaints from women. They tend to pressure you quite strongly to continue seeing them after the meal. Even if they don’t mention it in their profile, they may touch you during dinner or try to kiss you in the elevator. That’s why we often receive angry complaints from women. However, it’s all about how you handle the situation. If he touches you, firmly slap his hand away with a smile. You can also knock his hand away before he touches you. If he tries to kiss you, hold his face back with your hand. These are some ways to protect yourself. The key is to respond with a smile. Then, after dinner, you can simply refuse no matter how forcefully he pressures you. Rather than just saying no, you could say something like, “I can’t do that unless we’ve met at least three times.” That way, you’ll probably be able to meet him twice more, and during that time, you can carefully consider whether you really want an adult relationship with this man. If you come to feel that you find him even a little appealing, you can then move on to negotiating the terms of the arrangement. Incidentally, we also often receive feedback from women saying that men like this offered such a low allowance that they regretted it. So be sure to confirm the allowance in advance, or you may regret it later. If the allowance is what you’re hoping for, then trying an adult relationship with him may be an option.