I’m a male member. I have a few questions, and I’d especially like to hear women’s opinions.

I’m in my 60s and still wavering, with a B-type arrangement as my main preference. It seems I’ve been summoned by Mr. Mac... lol > “With women in these arrangements, the ‘relationship’ with a man seems to become fixed within the first one or two dates. They categorize them as ‘this papa is someone I’ll be intimate with’ or ‘this papa is dinner-only.’” I feel the same way. I enjoy having a good meal, so thinking about how to respond if he invites me somewhere after dinner on the first date makes me feel like my concentration on the meal is being disrupted. That’s why I’m a B type... lol That said, precisely because it’s the first date, I make it clear that things will move forward from the next time onward. Otherwise, in my experience, you get categorized—and then they leave... (>o<) > “It seems like I’m the only one who’s made it to a third date.” Despite her being extremely popular, don’t you find it a little odd that there hasn’t been an adult relationship? Isn’t the questioner giving her a large allowance even though they only have dinner together? From the parts about gifts and such, it also seems that she’s satisfied with that and feels things are fine as they are. I don’t think there’s much point in dragging things out without deciding on the terms. It’s fine to fall for someone, but please don’t forget that this is a dating club...

I’m Saito, the column writer ♪ Regarding the travel expenses, please don’t tie the allowance to the amount you spent, saying things like, “It cost me ¥〇〇…” For women, what matters is receiving money they can freely use. Your actual expenses aren’t really relevant to them. So if that’s your concern, giving her ¥200,000 in cash is what papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) is really about. If you start thinking only in terms of your own circumstances, there’s no end to it, so I think it’s better to set your own standards and stick to them. Woman B is 90% likely to be the type who keeps promising an adult relationship (intimate) but never follows through. The other men simply gave up sooner. She sees you as someone she can string along. If you go in with that assumption, you won’t be disappointed. In fact, I may have even been involved with the same woman. I met this extremely popular woman, B, and while we were eating, the chef at that Michelin-starred sushi restaurant told me, “You’d definitely be better off staying away from her.” He may have come there with another man before and overheard the way she was being courted. Haha. Of course, relationships between men and women are unpredictable, and no one knows how things will turn out. If you’re unsure, you should take action while being prepared for the possibility of failure. You’ll gain valuable experience.

Maezawa from the Corporate Planning Office here as well. > I’m taking her to a place she wants to visit and covering nearly ¥200,000 in travel expenses. In this case, should I give her an allowance on top of that? Even if it’s somewhere she wants to go, the person she’d most like to go with might actually be a friend. So even if you cover all the expenses, her agreeing to go means that, in a sense, things balance out to zero. She may feel that she doesn’t have to go if you’re not going, but she’s happy that you’re willing to go that far for her. That’s why I think giving her an allowance on top of the expenses is generally appropriate. However, I don’t think there are many women who expect to be paid based strictly on the hours spent together, since you’ll be together for 24 hours. (If she were that kind of woman, she probably wouldn’t be someone you especially liked in the first place.) So I think calculating it on a daily basis would be acceptable to her as well. Since this is a two-day, one-night trip, I feel that the allowance for two regular meetings would probably be sufficient. That said, as I always say, what matters isn’t the going rate or what other people do—it’s whether both of you are satisfied with the arrangement. Even if she appears satisfied at the time, she may not truly feel that way, and there’s a chance she won’t want to continue seeing you afterward. So I think it’s best to decide carefully. If you’ve already become fairly close, the best approach would be to ask her directly how much allowance she would want for the two-day, one-night trip. She’ll probably name a somewhat modest amount, so I think a man who can add just a little extra to her figure would come across as classy. That said, there’s nothing wrong with simply giving her the amount she requested. I hope you have a wonderful trip.

I’m Rula, a male UC member and a member of the new salon. > Would it be fair to assume that she trusts me quite a lot if she’s willing to travel together? Whether I’d go so far as to say “quite a lot” is debatable, but I do think she trusts you to a certain extent. You wouldn’t even consider traveling with someone you disliked spending time with over dinner, after all. > Should I give her additional allowance? I would. However, in my case, I would only travel with a woman I had a monthly arrangement with. Since I give her that month’s allowance at the beginning of the month, I wouldn’t provide any additional travel allowance in particular. > Should I just decide on the terms and wait patiently until she says she’s ready? In my view, “wait patiently” is pretty close to “give up.” I think you should properly analyze the situation and take the initiative. > But if I invest a lot and it ultimately turns out to be impossible, it would be painful to feel like I’d been scammed… Hmm. I don’t think this way of thinking is likely to lead to a good outcome. Even if you invest a lot and things don’t work out, the woman is not responsible or at fault in the slightest. You should start by genuinely accepting that it’s entirely due to your own lack of appeal. If you’re already at the stage of feeling like you’ve been scammed, you absolutely shouldn’t be giving expensive presents. You wrote: > The third date happens to be her birthday. If she’s making time to see you on her actual birthday, then regardless of whether things develop into an adult relationship, I personally feel that alone is worth giving her an expensive wallet as a present… If it were me, I would: - Give her a reasonably priced present on her birthday and enjoy the day. - Clearly tell her how happy I am that she’s seeing me on her birthday and how much fun I’m having. I wouldn’t bring up an adult relationship at all that day—presumably the third date. - Around the next date, hint at the terms of an adult relationship without actually asking her yet. - Before the fifth date, clearly tell her over LINE, “I’d like us to move on to an adult relationship next time.” - If she doesn’t respond positively, I’d temporarily stop contacting her. That’s how I’d approach it.

I’m a male member in Seattle. First of all, the cost of the trip—whether it’s ¥100,000 or ¥1,000,000—has nothing to do with the allowance. These days, I only travel with women I have a monthly arrangement with, so I hardly give them anything extra. I have given 0.5 once, calling it a souvenir allowance, though. When I used to travel with women who weren’t on a monthly arrangement, I paid the pay-per-meeting amount multiplied by the number of times. Two consecutive days is tiring, so every other day was the shortest schedule. So, as the number of nights increased, someone receiving 5 per meeting would get 5, 5, 10, 10, 15, 15, 20, 20… At most, I think I’ve done a five-night trip. Before leaving, I clearly tell them: 5, 5, 10, 10, 15, 15, 20. Next, regarding the conservative B type: if it were me, I’d bring up an adult relationship (intimate) over LINE before meeting for the third time. If she turned me down, whether to continue seeing her would depend on how the questioner feels about this B type. If she refuses on the third meeting, I’d consider her an A type, so unless I really liked her, I’d probably end things. As for things like wallets, at this stage you’re basically friends, so I feel you may be giving her too much.