What do you do if the condom breaks during intimacy?

You must have been so shocked by the sudden mishap that your mind went completely blank 😢 I’ve had a similar experience myself. I did reflect on the fact that I hadn’t educated myself enough, but more than anything, I was honestly furious, thinking, “How can someone be so irresponsible?” In situations like this, I really wish the man would take proper responsibility by saying things like, “Are you okay?” “Let’s go to the hospital,” or “I’ll cover the expenses.” I’ve had a condom break during intimacy several times myself. There can be various causes, but things like vigorous movement, a fingernail catching it, or pulling out without holding the base can all lead to unexpected accidents. Looking back, I sometimes think I should have simply said, “I’m anxious and need your help.” Sadly, if you haven’t been able to contact him for a month, I would give up and move on. It’s frustrating, but I think it’s a waste of any more time or emotional energy on a man like that. That said, saying, “If it’s not enough, I’ll give you the rest next time,” and then completely disappearing is truly an incredibly insincere way for him to behave. This isn’t about how you expressed yourself—it’s a problem with his integrity. I’m absolutely furious on your behalf!! What happened this time was truly unfortunate, but not all men are like that. I hope you’ll next meet someone sincere who will treat you with the care you deserve. Please don’t blame yourself too much. P.S. I’m honored to be included among Makeotoko-san and his friends ☺️

They don’t normally tear. (Japanese-made condoms in particular are well known for their quality.) If one did tear, I can only think that it was either a foreign-made condom—some of the ones provided at cheaper love hotels may prioritize cost—or that it was damaged by catching on a fingernail before being put on, or tampered with by a previous hotel guest. > He didn’t really apologize much when it tore either, so I felt that maybe, from the man’s perspective, he didn’t think he had done anything wrong. Since it didn’t tear because of anything the man did, I don’t think he considered the tearing itself to be his fault. However, when it results in the woman having to worry about a possible pregnancy, he should be considerate, and it seems only natural that he should cover the related costs rather than make the woman pay. In that sense, saying, “I’ll give you the rest when we meet next time if it isn’t enough,” and then cutting off contact makes him seem like a particularly awful man. If you met him through Universe Club, the club can contact him on your behalf. But this was a man you met somewhere other than Universe Club, right? Hearing stories like this makes me think Universe Club may offer a little more peace of mind. I say “a little” because even if the club contacts the man and he refuses to cooperate, all they can really do is ban him from the club. They still can’t force him to pay the outstanding amount. I wonder how many people would want to be permanently banned from rejoining over ¥10,000.

I feel like a condom has broken on me around ten times in my life. Most of the time, I noticed before ejaculating, though. It was about three years ago, I think. During my first time having sex with a girl I’d met outside the papa-katsu scene, I put on a condom, had sex, and ejaculated. When I was pulling out, I smugly lectured her, saying, “Hold the base of the condom. Sometimes it gets left inside when you pull out and can lead to pregnancy.” She held the condom while I safely pulled out. She was in a hurry because the last train was approaching, so she rushed off. When I turned on the lights in the dark city hotel room, I realized the condom had broken—in other words, I’d ejaculated inside her completely by accident. I’m sure Fuu-san understands, but condoms are kind of small, aren’t they…? Mac-san, They break when penetration lasts a long time. When things go on for a while, I sometimes pull out once, but then the condom dries out. Still, it’s a hassle, so you just put it back in as it is, right? That’s when they tend to break. Also, was it Sagami—the 0.01 mm ones? Those seriously slip off and get left inside. The first time I slept with Ace, one got left inside, so I remember it very clearly. It happened a few more times with those condoms after that, so I stopped using the 0.01 ones. If Fuu-san used Sagami 0.01 mm condoms, one would slip off for you too. You must have experienced it if you’ve used them. It’s a classic problem for guys with big packages. By the way, an ex-girlfriend once bought me some condoms as a souvenir from Germany. When I put one on, it was pretty loose. The Netherlands and Germany are countries of giants, so I’m on the smaller side there. Update: Yay, more people whose condoms have broken (Katase-san). Weirdly, I’m happy about it.

You should have asked at the time you found out: “If I’m pregnant, I’ll need your consent, so please give me your address and real name as well.” If you confront him by insisting it’s his fault, he may run away. But if you set aside who’s to blame for the moment and approach him by saying, “I’m worried because I might be pregnant, so please help me,” some people will cooperate. A papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) relationship is still a relationship between people, so handle it carefully.

I’ve never had a condom break, so this is just speculation, but I think a man’s mindset is basically, “It’s not my fault—the condom was faulty.” So when he’s blamed one-sidedly, he feels like he’s being criticized and thinks, “This woman seems like a hassle. I’ll cut things off.” The questioner should have first set a date for their next meeting, then, when he was in a good mood—perhaps after sex—shown him the receipt and sadly said, “This ended up costing me this much.” It’s basically like collecting a debt. A debt is money you lent, and there’s no guarantee you’ll get it back. If you act high-handedly, as though repayment is only natural, he may get angry and simply refuse to take responsibility. The questioner wasn’t at fault, of course, but she handled the situation poorly. Maybe that loser guy uses cheap condoms, or has spikes growing on his penis. They don’t break just from being pulled a little. Maybe he wanted to brag about how big he is, but a tiny difference in size isn’t enough to make one break. Or maybe he kept rubbing even though the vagina wasn’t wet. I barely do any foreplay, but I use plenty of lube, and I can tell from the way things feel when the inside starts getting wet, so I move slowly until that happens. So they break if you keep going for a long time? I didn’t know that—thanks. I never go more than 20 minutes after penetration, though. Occasionally I take a break if I’m not feeling well, but then I also take a shower and change the condom. If I’m not feeling well, it’s probably because of the condom anyway.

Am I being a little too lenient? Even though the club mediates, once you’ve been introduced, responsibility falls on the two people involved. If you’re doing papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) and having adult relationships (intimate) with multiple people, I think it’s better to be on the pill. I hope it never happens, but there are probably papas (male supporters) who will force things without protection. When Fuu meets a woman for the first time and she seems likely to enter a monthly arrangement, if she isn’t taking the pill, I recommend it to her. I also tell her about a clinic that prescribes the largest amount in Japan. They offer online consultations and deliver the pills, so I recommend them. Protect yourself. Papa-katsu is an individual battle, so prepare accordingly and look after yourself!

It’s never broken for me. Even if it did happen, I generally only see partners who are on the pill, so I don’t think it would turn into a big issue. I don’t know whether you should do it or not, but if it were me, I’d give up—it’s too much hassle. I think it’s best to stay away from anything troublesome.