We had our first date at a restaurant in Osaka Daimaru in mid-April, but the woman, who was 26, showed up wearing sneakers and a hat. I thought, “I guess she doesn’t care about dressing appropriately for the occasion.” To me, it’s the equivalent of a man showing up to meet a woman in shorts.
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I could understand that kind of outfit for a first date at an amusement park or while camping, regardless of whether it was through Universe.
I’m fairly good-looking myself, and I’m confident I can dress appropriately for the occasion.
To all the male members: Would you be bothered if a woman wore a hat and sneakers on a first date at a restaurant in the city?
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Since it’s a restaurant at Daimaru, she may have dressed appropriately for the time, place, and occasion.
If it were a meal at a high-end hotel restaurant, she’d probably come dressed more formally.
Personally, Fuu finds women who don’t look like they’ll cost much more appealing, though.
Also, if this was an offer through a club, you can specify the dress code. Since “formal” is an option, she probably just stuck with the default casual style.
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Hmm, true. I remember one man saying that a woman once showed up for a meeting in Ginza wearing sneakers and jeans, and he couldn’t understand why she would do that.
But when he asked other men, most of them seemed to have a more positive take, saying things like, “Jeans are totally fine,” and “You see people dressed like that in Ginza too.”
If the meeting were at a restaurant with a dress code, I’d understand wondering, “Why sneakers?” But if you’re meeting at Osaka Daimaru, sneakers seem perfectly fine to me.
Considering how many post-date surveys we receive from women saying they were made to walk quite a bit despite wearing high heels, choosing sneakers so they can comfortably walk if necessary actually seems pretty reasonable.
There was also a TV segment before about how different generations view sneakers. They compared old and modern footage of people walking around town and found that more people used to wear dress shoes, whereas sneakers are more common now.
The conclusion was that young people consider sneakers fashionable.
That’s simply what it means for generations to be different. And one of the good things about papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) is being able to learn about how things are today, so I feel people could be a little more open-minded.
> I’m confident in dressing appropriately for the occasion.
Young people might be looking at you and thinking, “Why are you wearing dress shoes on a date? Are you going to work?”
Come to think of it, Ivy League style used to be popular, and there were also those DC designer brands...
Back then...
*stares wistfully into the distance*
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I actually prefer women like that over women decked out in designer brands from head to toe.
The jeans of the woman I’ve been seeing for 11 years have had holes in them forever. She’s never had her nails done. She’s always bare-faced, and makeup actually makes her look older.
Well, my monthly arrangement partner and I only go to family restaurants anyway. Lately, it’s been McDonald’s nonstop. Lots of Chiikawa, too.
P.S.
I had to laugh at how many answers said sneakers were fine. I only look at her face—I don’t even get around to checking her shoes.
I’m sure there are men who dislike cheap-looking outfits, too. Bottom line: either is fine. Everyone’s different.
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It wouldn’t bother me at all.
I’d be embarrassed by my own inadequacy for not being able to provide her with an appropriate outfit.
By “Osaka Daimaru,” do you mean Daimaru Umeda or Daimaru Shinsaibashi?
As far as I know, there aren’t any restaurants there with a dress code or that require you to be dressed formally to get in.
If you want the woman to dress appropriately, why not tell her the dress code—or at least what kind of outfit you’d prefer—in advance?
That’s part of the fun of papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), too.
Someone in their fifties who can do papa-katsu despite inconsistent first-person pronouns and not even knowing how to use punctuation properly probably doesn’t exist.
I’ve fallen for yet another bait question.
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> I’m fairly blessed in the looks department, and I’m confident I can dress appropriately for any occasion.
A 50-year-old guy who calls himself “ore,” says he’s good-looking, and wraps up by saying he has “jishin” (confidence) in how he dresses.
I’m sure the person asking the question must be incredibly popular, then.
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I’m Andy, a member here.
I’m based in the Kanto area, so I don’t know Osaka Daimaru, but Daimaru near Tokyo Station would be absolutely fine. It would be inconsiderate only if you went there after being told in advance that it wasn’t acceptable.
I usually wear sneakers to first meetings myself, so I may not be the best person to ask.
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If it suits you, I don’t see any problem with it.
This isn’t Osaka, but even when I look at the customers at Daimaru, they’re dressed pretty normally.
As for hats, I don’t see them very often these days, but I have seen people who really suited berets.
Personally, I appreciate it when someone wears comfortable shoes that are easy to walk in, since it means I don’t have to worry as much.
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Osaka Daimaru would’ve been perfect. I’d love to say, “Please stop by the fifth floor after dinner,” but unfortunately, it closed in January this year.
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It doesn’t bother me at all.
If anything, I’d be happy to know we could go to amusement parks or camping trips together.
If it bothers you, why not go shopping for clothes and give her something as a gift?
Or maybe she has a reason, such as wanting to avoid being identified.
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