I give my female companions an allowance, but I do so reluctantly. Deep down, I want them to date me without money being involved. I have more money than I could ever spend, so it’s not that I’m stingy—I just don’t want to think of myself as an older man whom women will only pay attention to because of his money. What should a man like this do in a dating club?

This is a topic our representative, Kida, absolutely loves, so I’ll answer. You’re asking: “I want to date a woman without money being involved. What should I do?” That’s a wonderful question. Here are the ideas that come to mind: - Get plastic surgery and become handsome - Replace cash with gifts - Use gift cards instead of cash - Use iTunes cards instead of cash - Become a master of intimacy - Meet lots of different women - Give her your credit card, saying, “Here, keep this as a good-luck charm” - Try pursuing women closer to your own age - Spend money on dates, meals, and trips - Say, “Would you consider dating me without money involved? I want us to have an equal relationship. I won’t make you uncomfortable.” - Say she can pay the money back later and have her sign an IOU - Spend around ¥300,000 on a single date - Put her tuition payments on your credit card - Pay her rent - Teach her your business know-how and introduce her to your network Those are the only completely ridiculous ideas I could come up with. Still, I’m sure there must be a way. The idea that money has to come first just because it’s a dating club is outdated. Maybe it’s possible to make it work by offering different kinds of value and satisfaction. For example, imagine picking her up in a Bentley, buying her some clothes, taking her to Sushi Saito for dinner, and then heading to The Peninsula for some private time. If you could take someone on a date like that, she’d probably feel like a princess. But is that really separate from this—the allowance? I’ll ask some of our members and see what they think.

Mamiya from Universe Tokyo here—I’ll give you a straightforward answer. I’m sorry, but based on your way of thinking, I don’t think dating-club activities are right for you. You come across as someone who would be better suited to a woman who says, “I just want money, and all this boyfriend-girlfriend stuff is honestly a pain.” I also think the relationships formed here involve a kind of tug-of-war between people’s insecurities. A man who isn’t confident about his age or appearance but wants to date a young woman has to somehow win over a woman who wants a boyfriend who’s young, attractive, and someone she can genuinely see as her partner… I do know couples who eventually developed a relationship without an allowance, but if things go wrong at the very beginning, they usually don’t last long. It may be a harsh reality, but I believe women who give men the chance to dream are also looking for a relationship where they receive a fair return. I’d be happy to support you in meeting someone who feels that spending money on the woman he likes is worthwhile. Money isn’t everything, but sometimes it can be more powerful than love.