Tomorrow, I have my second adult date (intimate) with a 75-year-old small-business owner.
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It’s not that I’m put off by his age or appearance, which many people here often mention. Rather, I’ve started to feel uncomfortable with the fact that someone who is a company president and has a certain social standing would join a dating club and try to pay someone my age—young enough to be his granddaughter—to be with him.
I also received an allowance for being intimate with him the first time, so I’m hardly in a position to criticize him. But part of me thinks, “Someone with truly respectable social standing wouldn’t belong in a place like this,” and, with all due respect, “I suppose he’s just a small-business owner after all.” (I work for what people would consider a top-tier company.)
I’m also starting to dislike myself for heading out to dinner with him tomorrow while feeling this way.
What I’d like to ask is: Are there any techniques for smiling and having dinner with someone while looking down on them? And is there a way to propose a dinner-only (no intimacy) relationship from the second meeting onward and continue seeing him under those terms?
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂20s👑Universe female member
An owner of a small or midsize business may actually have more money at their disposal than a hired CEO of a major corporation.
Even CEOs of major companies and politicians are human too, so some of them do papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) normally. Isn’t the person asking this question—who works for a top-tier company and does papa-katsu—in the same boat? You’re putting yourself on a pedestal, lol.
This could be a great opportunity to receive a generous allowance, so if that’s how you feel, just turn him down. It would be a shame to waste the opportunity, so please pass it on to another woman.
Even if you look down on him, couldn’t you just avoid showing it and make things work somehow?
That said, he seems like he has plenty of money, so if you can’t have an adult relationship (intimate), he’ll probably make an offer to another woman... That might be better for you too.
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If you go by the logic of “If you don’t like it, just turn it down. Don’t put up with it,” then most women would disappear.
If it were me, I’d keep chanting “Money, money, money, money” in my head like a Buddhist prayer, and whisper “money” to myself whenever I went to the bathroom.
After the date, I’d mutter “money” while smoking, then again while taking a bath after getting home, and one last time before going to bed.
Every man here should sign up to be a male escort. Then maybe they’d understand, at least a little, how women feel.
That’s what this world is about: finding someone who’s tolerable enough to compromise with.
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There’s no need to force yourself to endure something unreasonable.
You should first sort out whether you’re doing this for your own benefit and why you feel it’s necessary. Otherwise, you probably won’t really feel the benefits.
I think the man you’re seeing is involved in this because he believes he can provide those benefits for you as well.
For both men and women, it’s only natural to think:
> People with a respectable social standing wouldn’t be involved in something like this.
So I think it’s simply a matter of you and the man you’re seeing fulfilling each other’s needs.
As long as neither of you is someone the other dislikes, it’s possible for both of you to feel the benefits and come away with nothing but advantages.
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Here’s what you can do:
1. Change the way you think about it.
2. Think of it this way: she’s actually a 20-year-old student, but somehow ended up switching bodies with a 75-year-old owner of a small or mid-sized company.
This isn’t a sex service—it’s a dating club, okay?
If you don’t like it, just say no.
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