I’m a beginner who joined Universe Club two weeks ago.
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In what situations do you use Letter Date?
- People I can contact through PATOLO
One of the benefits of a dating club is having plenty of information disclosed in advance and being able to communicate beforehand. So, for anyone I can contact through PATOLO, I figure I can send them a message there and then suggest a date in whatever way seems appropriate.
- People I can’t contact through PATOLO
When someone sends me a “You seem wonderful” with a message, but I can’t contact them through PATOLO, I feel like I’d rather exchange messages through Letter Date before meeting them. However, I’m worried about whether it’s actually possible to meet through Letter Date.
If someone sends me a “You seem wonderful” along with a message, is it reasonable to assume they have some level of interest or positive feelings toward me? Can things work out through Letter Date?
I’d appreciate hearing about your experiences, including any cases where things went well through Letter Date.
👤Asked byGuest👨GenderMale🎂40s👑Universe male member
In my personal opinion, it’s better to stick with regular arranged dates when you’ve only recently signed up.
Letter dating can work well for some people, but if you’re new, there’s a fairly good chance it may not go smoothly.
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I use Letter Date when I’m likely to be dating somewhere I’m not very familiar with, when a woman may have specific requests regarding food, when coordinating schedules seems difficult, or when it would simply be quicker to communicate with her directly.
I use Patro when making an offer to a woman who isn’t on Universe.
I only make offers through Letter Date when one of the reasons mentioned above applies, and I’ve never had one not work out.
As for “That’s lovely” messages with an accompanying note, I find it bothersome to receive them from women I’m not interested in, so I keep my profile private.
As for whether it’s a sign of interest, as you put it, I don’t think there’s any special meaning behind it. You should judge her feelings based on the content of the message you received.
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I think people who use letter dates probably don’t give enough thought to the circumstances.
I use letter dates in every situation as well, and I’m satisfied because I’ve been able to meet most of the women.
I’ve made my peace with the fact that if I can’t meet someone this way, the relationship probably wouldn’t last even if we managed to meet for the first time through a setup date.
That said, my current success is largely due to experience—I’ve made offers to more than 40 women through the club.
Letter dates are more suited to experienced users, since there’s no guarantee that you’ll actually meet.
It’s not uncommon for things to fizzle out while you’re exchanging messages.
By contrast, the advantage of a setup date is that you can at least meet in person the first time.
Unless you already have experience with papa-katsu apps, I think it’s better to avoid letter dates until you understand the basic norms of using a dating club.
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I assume both exist because Letter Date was created first.
As for how to use it, I agree with what It’s Me said.
Also, no matter how many times you look at an older man’s photo, you’re never going to think he’s handsome, so I don’t think it’s a good idea to send a photo before meeting. Even with older men, the real-life version is usually more manageable than the photo. Though, of course, it’s different if the woman wants to see one.
If someone who has used dating apps approaches this with the same mindset and atmosphere as an app, it can feel like something’s off. I think beginners, especially, are better off using a standard setup.
Marika
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With letter dating, it may be easier to understand what not to do rather than how to use it.
The worst kind of letter date is when meaningless messages drag on and on, while the date itself never gets scheduled.
From a woman’s perspective, no matter how long she messages with a man, she’s constantly facing the risk that it will all be unpaid if they never actually meet. Do this, and she’ll seriously dislike you—and you may even end up with the worst possible feedback.
From a man’s perspective, you pay only half the setting fee and can exchange contact information, so there are nothing but advantages. I’ve heard from women in the industry that “there are definitely some papa supporters who use it purely to save money.”
The best way to improve your chances with letter dating is to set the date as soon as possible, then use the time to talk about each other’s hobbies, likes, and dislikes so you can both enjoy the first date more.
If things go well, you can meet for the first time after already making a good impression.
—It’s me
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