I’m struggling because my relationships don’t seem to last long after going to a hotel.

Start with what you can do. The questioner seems to feel “down,” but that feeling not only serves no purpose—it also drains your motivation to keep going. People often share stories here about long-term arrangements, so you may find yourself wondering, “Why am I the only one who can’t make things last?” But maintaining any relationship between a man and a woman is difficult, and I don’t think this is a problem unique to you. Especially with arrangements through Universe Club, since both intimacy and money are involved, I’d say long-lasting relationships are the exception. I’ve made offers to quite a few people myself, but only two arrangements have continued—and even those could end suddenly. It’s a rather unexciting conclusion, but whether something continues may ultimately come down to compatibility in the broadest sense. With that in mind, here’s one piece of advice: if you meet someone who makes you think, “Maybe this person,” why not take the initiative and approach them just a little more proactively?

In my case, among the papas who made an offer and went with me to a hotel, I’ve never had one fail to invite me again. I don’t consciously focus on anything in particular during intimacy, but I do think it’s important to give off the feeling that you’re genuinely in love, along with a sense of shyness. You get butterflies and feel shy around someone you’re romantically involved with, right? Many men are in sexless marriages, or even if they visit sex workers, those encounters end as one-time relationships. Deep down, they become dissatisfied with not being able to feel the excitement and freshness of romance, or their partner’s shyness. Why not keep that in mind and reconsider how you act? Good luck.

I enjoy seeing a woman get carried away, so ideally I want to see her genuinely delighted—or be able to act it perfectly. I also like hearing her say, “I love you, so let’s meet again,” or being able to act that perfectly. Next, it’s nice when we share hobbies and food preferences, and can exchange casual messages—not necessarily every day. That’s what the three women I’ve been seeing for over two years are like.

From the man’s perspective, it’s rare to meet a woman he wants to continue seeing after having sex once or twice. More than anything, I think it comes down to whether you’re genuinely compatible—whether you’re the kind of people who can bring that out after meeting only two or three times. At a club, both people tend to be very considerate of each other, so the relationship often continues without either person being able to fully show their true selves. That can make it easier to maintain a good relationship through the allowance, but it usually doesn’t become anything more than that. Whether it develops into a fulfilling long-term relationship seems to depend on your natural compatibility and personality type, not just on being in a club setting. Rather than trying to force things, as the questioner seems to be considering, I think someone you can relax around, let your guard down with, and be yourself around will naturally show more emotion and become far more appealing than the other women at the club.

If the average level of satisfaction in a relationship is 50 out of 100, I don’t think a relationship would last at 50 or even 60 points. It probably needs to be 70 or 80 or higher to continue. That doesn’t necessarily mean there was anything wrong with you. I think many women misunderstand this point. Some men may enjoy being pampered, but I don’t like being treated in a way that makes me feel like I’m being catered to. Also, I usually go on dates with women because they invite me. I rarely ask them out myself. If you made any mistake, perhaps you weren’t observing the other person closely enough or weren’t able to communicate with them effectively.

It’s definitely hard to maintain a long-term arrangement, isn’t it? Compatibility plays a role, but honestly, from a man’s perspective, as long as he has the money, he can make offers to as many women as he wants. Since new women are constantly joining, I think women are overwhelmingly at a disadvantage. I was with the club for two years. Only one arrangement lasted a full year, the next lasted about ten months, and the rest lasted around two to four months. At the moment, I’m not seeing anyone regularly. I haven’t met that many women, but in my experience, women who are able to maintain a long-term relationship with a man generally fall into one of two categories: - The man is extremely taken with her. - She’s very considerate and good at accommodating the man’s schedule and circumstances. That’s about it, at least based on my experience. There may be other factors, of course. The first one is mostly luck. No matter how hard you try, there’s only so much you can do when it comes to someone’s personal preferences. Since everyone likes different things, all you can really do is wait for the right match. The second may be something you can improve through effort, but there aren’t that many people who are naturally good at it, so in a sense, it might be a talent. Even in ordinary relationships, if it’s difficult to make things last, people end up getting divorced, so it’s not easy. If you fall into the second category, it may be something you can improve to some extent, so keep trying different approaches and doing your best. You seem to have a positive outlook, so I’m rooting for you.

Some men aren’t particularly focused on continuing things, but if you were getting offers fairly regularly, there must have been men who wanted to build a long-term relationship with you. I think the most important thing to keep in mind during a date is figuring out the other person’s pace. The fact that repeatedly asking him out over LINE didn’t work also suggests that you weren’t able to gauge his pace. Personally, when a woman asks me out but I have to turn her down because of work, I make a point of being the one to invite her next time. Being asked out twice in a row can feel rather pressuring. That said, is simply waiting around without asking him out really the best approach? A man will go out of his way to contact a woman who is taking a passive, wait-and-see approach only when he really wants to continue seeing her. The more popular the man is, the lower your priority is likely to become. You’ll probably receive fewer offers going forward, so value each one and keep doing your best!