For men who have made an offer, how do you handle it if, after meeting the woman, you feel that she looks different from her photos and profile—or, to be honest, that she’s not really your type?
Since it’s the first time meeting each other, I wouldn’t feel insulted or hurt. If anything, I’d feel more uncomfortable if he invited me out again purely out of a sense of obligation because he had made the offer.
If being friends is an option, I think I’d be perfectly happy with that too.
(For reference, please assume this is a Type C arrangement, where an invitation on the day is expected, and there are no differences regarding the terms.)
I’m meeting him for the first time at the airport later today. I’m really looking forward to it, but I’m also worried that he might feel obligated in that regard.
I’m thinking of asking him directly, but I’m concerned that might make him feel even more uncomfortable, so I wanted to ask here!
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂40s👑Universe female member
If we don’t click, I usually part ways right there.
That said, there was one time when I felt during dinner that it wasn’t going to work, but she gave off the impression that she wanted to go to a hotel, so we ended up having an adult relationship (intimate).
To be honest, her personality was a bit difficult, but she was very attractive, so I enjoyed myself.
Men make offers to women they like based on their looks.
Even if you feel your personalities don’t match, if you decide to have an adult relationship (intimate), you’ll enjoy it for what it is, so don’t worry about it.
I would never have an adult relationship (intimate) purely out of a sense of obligation.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
If I feel we’re not a good match, I simply finish the meal and go our separate ways.
I don’t think friendship and an allowance-based relationship are compatible, so I would never suggest an unpaid arrangement to a woman I’ve just met through a dating club.
People who ask questions whose answers depend on the individual often seem like they just want to chat. This Q&A site isn’t really set up for repeated back-and-forth between the asker and respondent, so if you want to chat, I think you’d be better off using a forum intended for that purpose.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
Men tend to get excited about something new, so the first time is usually fine. If he’s a Type C, I’d invite him.
There are often compatibility issues, or it may be too painful to proceed, so if the second meeting goes well, I’d say it’s fine to just become friends.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
Since I choose women I’m attracted to, even if she’s somewhat different from what I expected, she’s still within my general type. It’s never to the point where she’s completely different from my type.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
I’m Shiro Usa, a new Q&A responder.
So, about today’s situation!
If he was the one who invited you, I think it’s fine to go ahead. You might find that you’re actually compatible afterward. There’s no need to overthink it or force yourself to go if you don’t want to.
As for gently turning down an adult relationship after dinner and any future dating, it’s simple. When the subject comes up, you can just say:
“I understood today’s meeting to be a first meeting.”
I think that should be fine even if it’s a Type C arrangement.
People often ask me, “Are you sure you want me?” I always answer, “I chose you out of hundreds of women, so of course I do.”
I hope this turns into a wonderful connection for you. Good luck!
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
