Because that man alone isn’t enough in various ways—whether it’s the allowance, his personality, or something else.
Also, I think men like that are more likely to want to have you all to themselves, or have little awareness that they’re a papa (a male supporter). They tend to want to call you their girlfriend.
Akari
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Whether he’s genuinely devoted or not doesn’t really matter, in my opinion. What matters is whether he makes you feel that way.
Unless you hire a private investigator to look into it, it’s all just assumptions anyway—and men can take plenty of actions to make you believe they’re devoted.
Personally, I’d rather be treated as if I were special by someone generous (well-paying), even if I’m just one of several, than be treated devotedly by someone offering a low allowance.
I still think this way because I’m relatively young, but perhaps those with more experience can tell whether someone is truly devoted or not（笑）
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If I were completely satisfied with just that person, I’d probably stick with one. But if he’s married to begin with, I don’t think he can fully satisfy a woman.
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Some people are genuinely devoted to one person, you could say.
I don’t think there are that many people who have no choice but to remain exclusive for various reasons, but I do believe they exist.
In our case, we’re both seeing only each other for now.
With an age gap of over 40 years, people tend to think, “Really?” But even judging comprehensively from our work, living situations, words, actions, hobbies, and interests, it’s highly likely that it’s genuine.
In my case, my wife had moved on, so I went to an agency interview looking for someone to be with. The woman I’m seeing said she had registered with Universe because she disliked her previous relationship, so I suppose our needs just happened to align.
When I first met her, she was barely in her twenties and very outspoken. She said things like, “I don’t want some old man telling me that,” and plenty more, but she was willing to face things honestly. I treated her very well from the beginning, so I think she gradually came to understand me, which is how we’ve ended up where we are now.
From my perspective, things like the allowance and compatibility may play a part, but I don’t feel they’re all that important. If anything, once both people come to feel that the other is truly important to them, they won’t go looking elsewhere.
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There’s a saying: “Learn from other people’s mistakes and reflect on your own behavior.”
You’ve decided to date just one woman exclusively, haven’t you?
Also, I wonder whether the allowance you give her is enough.
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Maybe they got carried away because I didn’t hide something that wasn’t really a question the other day. Now I’m getting some strange questions.
Is this what they call number ②?
It looks like a question, but they’re really asking something completely pointless, aren’t they?
Like, “Why doesn’t the sun set?”
They’re not actually troubled by anything, and whatever answer they get won’t affect them in the slightest.
Maybe they’re just satisfied because they know they’ll get a reply if they ask something—any attention will do?
I wonder if these attention seekers become more common in spring...
By the way, I’m sure there are plenty of women at dating clubs who are devoted once they decide to stick with one person.
Although, of course, that raises the question of how many genuinely good men there are—men good enough for someone to decide to stick with just them.
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There are women at dating clubs who stay devoted to just one person once they’ve made their choice. My partner and I have both chosen to see only each other.
I’m guessing you’re frustrated because, even when you really like a woman and want her to focus solely on you, she won’t commit to just you...
To have someone choose only you, I think the key points are:
1. Find a woman who already wants to focus on just one person if she finds someone she truly likes.
2. Provide her with sufficient financial support.
3. Don’t act selfishly just because you’re supporting her—respect her as a person.
4. Even if you’re very attracted to her looks and the two of you have amazing chemistry, if she continues to show no signs of liking you, don’t pursue her too deeply. Be willing to end things sooner rather than later.
Those are some of the main points that come to mind.
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I didn’t really understand the question.
Why do you have to be devoted to just one person once you’ve chosen them?
I can understand that if you’re married, but why is it wrong otherwise?
If you want to do papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) with a woman like that, couldn’t you just tell her, “Please don’t see any other papas. I’ll cover the full allowance you need”?
I actually find seeing multiple people easier and more convenient. I see multiple women, and they see multiple men. It’s fun, though….
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That’s not necessarily true.
It varies from woman to woman, and also depends on the man.
By the way, are you being faithful yourself?
Men can be drawn in by a woman’s appearance, but women need something else to make up for that—something that makes them feel, “I’m glad I chose him.”
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I think it’s because many people, like the person asking this question, lump all women together as “dating club women” and don’t see their partners as individuals.
If you maintain an appropriate distance and genuinely meet a woman’s needs, there are quite a few who will choose to be exclusive with you.
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I think it’s because something is missing that you alone can’t provide—whether that’s the allowance or compatibility, I can’t say.
I’m probably the devoted type. If I had a boyfriend, I wouldn’t be doing this, and I’m not capable of juggling multiple partners.
I’m sure there are others like that, too—people who are genuinely devoted.
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