This is Fullerene!
I think you should be the one to travel to the papa who lives farther away to meet him. Just make sure you still receive your allowance.
Since you wasted his time, you should make it up to him with your time.
The idea of repaying him with money—by making it free—feels like it puts too much emphasis on “time = money,” so I don’t think it’s really the right approach.
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Whether it’s during a business trip or in Tokyo, I’ve never had to deal with a cancellation or rescheduling, so I’m not sure how it would go. I guess I’d be like, “Wait, no allowance next time?”
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It really depends on the man’s personality, so what you should do will vary depending on what kind of person he is.
Generally speaking, though, even if you have a legitimate reason, if you cancel at the last minute on the day of the meeting, he may start prioritizing other women, and in some cases, the relationship may end altogether.
If you cancel the day before, I think many men will let it slide once, thinking that these things happen. But if it happens several times, he may start giving other women higher priority, or the relationship may come to an end.
If you cancel more than two days in advance, many men will probably be understanding and think, “Well, it can’t be helped.”
I’m not sure how far in advance you mean by “right before,” but sometimes nothing you do will make a difference, while other times everything will be fine even if you don’t do anything.
What matters most, though, is whether he can genuinely feel how sorry you are the next time you see him.
If that feeling comes across, I don’t think you necessarily need to discuss the allowance or anything like that.
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It really comes down to how you feel, so there’s no way for other people to know what would be best.
From my own experience, there have been a few women who said, “Since you gave me a present, I don’t need an allowance today,” and returned the allowance to me. I hadn’t given them presents expecting anything in return, but I appreciated their sense of fairness.
If they had told me beforehand, “If you give me this present, I won’t need an allowance,” it would have just felt like a matter of calculating the difference, and I don’t think I would have felt the same way about it.
I don’t know how your partner feels about it, and there are various ways to make up for the difference besides declining the allowance, but I hope this gives you some perspective.
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