I’m a student attending a university in Chiba, and I’m considering going for an interview.

You can list places you don’t want to go and places you’d prefer to meet on your profile. You can also write down your preferences for dates. For example, in your case, you could put: No Chiba Preferably within the 23 wards I’d prefer a private date somewhere as discreet as possible That should work. You should also think of an excuse in case someone you know sees you. “For example, my uncle is visiting,” “I’m going to a part-time job interview,” “I’m meeting someone to discuss a part-time job,” and so on. Unless someone actually sees you entering or leaving a love hotel, you can come up with almost any excuse. Acting secretive only makes you look more suspicious and draws attention, so just act confident.

There seems to be a misunderstanding, but women can also express their opinions and preferences about the meeting location when replying. With a dating club, women aren’t required to show up without question at whatever place and time the man specifies. Also, women’s profiles include a “Location” section. If they write something there like “No Chiba,” as Mac suggested, they’ll be less likely to be asked to meet somewhere they want to avoid. Even a woman from Nerima says it takes her about an hour to get to Ginza, so I don’t think that’s particularly unusual within the Kanto area. With a dating club, you’re also far less likely to deal with men canceling at the last minute or not showing up, as can happen on apps, so it seems like a good option.

There’s no need to insist on Tokyo—Chiba should be fine too. Meeting near a station is also perfectly okay, but I’d suggest choosing a private room at a restaurant with few or no student part-time staff, so you’re less likely to be recognized. As for the arrangement, if you keep things low-key and maintain a long-term relationship with just one or two men who are cautious about being identified, the risk of being recognized should be very low. Just take your time and judge each person carefully. At the moment, I’m the only papa (a male supporter) my partner sees, and we’ve been together for five years. She even says, “Papa-katsu isn’t so bad!” If you can find someone like that, it could be a really good experience.

There’s a section on the members’ page called “Setting Data,” where you can view statistics from the past three months. The top 10 meeting spots are all hotel lobbies. But there seem to be regional differences—the top spot for the Chiba branch was “in front of the Lawson by a certain station exit.” Is that really okay? lol. Oh, but it’s actually in Tokyo, not Chiba. There’s a profile section where you can indicate your preferred date locations, and I often see people who live in Chiba write things like, “I’d prefer dates within Tokyo’s 23 wards,” or, “My place is far away, so I’d like to wrap up by 11 p.m. (unless you’re willing to cover the taxi fare).” So I think it would be a good idea to mention that during your interview. I don’t know which part of Chiba you’re in, but if you date in areas on the eastern side of the Yamanote Line that are relatively close to Chiba—like Okachimachi, Kinshicho, or Yurakucho to Shimbashi—there tend to be more older men around, so it might feel safer. A considerate man would probably take that into account, and you can always mention it when you meet. I have a whole lot I’d like to say about “in front of the Lawson by a certain station exit” if we had time to get into it lol, but at least you’re very unlikely to see any students there, so it should be fine. Best of luck. Taro

If you’re that worried about it, you’ll only make it more obvious. A girl around 20 once said, “It’s harder to tell when you act confident and natural.” Whether you’re in her hometown or near her university, carrying yourself openly will make you look less suspicious. Today, I was walking around a woman’s neighborhood and downtown with our shoulders or arms occasionally touching. I think that actually looks natural because it’s about the same distance you’d keep when walking with your daughter, family, or friends. Even if someone sees you, saying, “He’s a relative,” is believable. But if there’s an unnatural distance in your conversation or the atmosphere between you, that excuse won’t work. Some girls worry about it at first, but the longer you see each other, the less they care—so much so that it can surprise you. They may even introduce you to their friends or take you to a friend’s business. If it feels too risky, you don’t have to join a club. It won’t be fun for the man either. Your youth is an incredibly precious time in life. Whether it’s club activities or student life, this is the time to enjoy yourself. If joining a club helps you make the most of that time, I think it’s a perfectly valid option.