A question about why women get into a man’s car when they’ve only just met

When I was dating my wife, I drove her home every time—even to the prefecture next to the neighboring one—so a three- or four-hour round trip doesn’t bother me at all. I’m Paper Airplane. After dropping her off, I have to drive home alone. > If it’s in the opposite direction, it’s just a little inconvenient. Then don’t come by car. That attitude shows in the way you treat her and the overall vibe. You need to date someone whose company leaves you happily savoring the afterglow on the drive home… and, of course, you need to go on enjoyable dates.

This is Natsuki Otsuka from Universe Club. Thank you for your question ♪ Since it can be difficult to refuse a kind gesture, I think the smoothest option would be to give her taxi fare and part ways ♪

There are also some lovely women who are considerate, so sometimes I try not to turn them down when they ask. That’s why I can understand the questioner’s concern. With that in mind, I don’t think driving her home simply because you came by car is necessarily the best option. Taking it a step further: **Coming by car from the very first meeting may itself be a bad idea.** (Of course, in rural areas, getting around without a car can be difficult.) In that case, it might be best to drive to the meeting spot, leave the car in a parking lot, and get around mainly on foot or by taxi if you want to be considerate of her. I think it’s better to start using the car once you’ve gotten to know each other better. That said, if walking is a hassle, you want to show off your car, or you feel that the enclosed space of a car is ideal for getting closer, then rather than driving her home yourself, I think it would be better to pay for her taxi. However, some women may not be able to get home on ¥10,000, so you should properly research whether that amount will be enough. If you can’t confirm it, it would probably be better to give her a little extra. For example, a taxi from Tokyo to Yokohama could cost around ¥15,000 with the late-night surcharge. If you pay for the taxi but the amount isn’t enough, it can actually work against you despite having offered money, so be careful.

There doesn’t seem to be anything wrong with the way you’re inviting her. She doesn’t have to get in, and she has the option of getting off at the nearest station, yet she chooses to ride with you and have you drop her off right in front of her home. From a woman’s perspective, that probably means she feels very safe and comfortable with you. If it bothers you, as Marika suggested, you could give her money for a taxi. But that would be a shame. Taking things a little further in your interactions is how a relationship deepens, and if everything written here is accurate, I think you’re doing quite well. There may be something not mentioned in the question that makes this effectively coercive, but it’s difficult to guess what that might be. Even if that is the case, if you keep repeating this conduct, you’ll probably eventually run into a strong-willed woman who will put you firmly in your place. Maybe you can reflect on it then. Taro

I’m voting for Marika. If you’re considering saying something that may come across as rude, I think the polite thing would be to simply add ¥10,000 as taxi fare. Based on your question, I also think it’s strange that you’re the kind of man who would post and ask about something like this.

It’s hard to turn them down, and being tempted by the convenience of getting a ride home is understandable too… Being sent home by train late at night also makes you wonder, “Is this really papa-katsu??” I think the most considerate option is to give her taxi fare. Just don’t ask her to bring you a receipt. Once you’ve known each other longer and you both feel comfortable, I think it’s fine to drive her home if that’s what she wants. Marika