I’m registered with and active on several dating clubs.

Papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) should benefit both people. It should be enjoyable for both of you. At least as far as Universe is concerned, I’ve never heard of any unspoken rules. You still have your whole future ahead of you, so don’t ever push yourself. Please put your safety and peace of mind first.

As Taro-san said, there’s a chance the men believe they’re the only ones you’re seeing. At one club, I was told to tell everyone that they were the first person I’d met since joining. Marika

I don’t know of any club with that kind of unspoken rule, but I do know several clubs like the one Mac-san described, where you’re absolutely not allowed to turn down an adult relationship after meeting. They’re clubs where the woman’s allowance is listed on her profile or given verbally, but they only mention the allowance for an adult relationship. Curious, I asked about what Universe Club calls transportation expenses. After looking slightly puzzled and pausing for a moment, they told me, “If you decide not to pursue the relationship, please give her around 10,000 yen as transportation expenses.” It is indeed an invitation-only club with no website, but it’s not the kind of place where a one-night arrangement costs 90,000 yen. Most women are around 50,000 yen, while talents typically range from 100,000 to 200,000 yen.

I think Universe Club is one of the more transparent clubs when it comes to manners and rules. Other clubs tend to be relatively lax, and since men may assume they’re seeing only a limited number of women—without knowing that a female member might be receiving offers from dozens of men—perhaps many of them don’t worry about STI risks and think going bare is fine. Still, if you’re asked directly, I think it’s perfectly fine to simply say no. It’s important to have the courage to say no—or rather, to build a relationship where you can say you don’t like something, not just when it comes to going bare. At the same time, we should recognize that there are women who are okay with it. Campaigning to change society by saying that’s wrong or shouldn’t happen is one thing, but as a practical solution, I think it’s important to understand the reality and clearly state that you’re different. More specifically, when things progress through foreplay and you’re about to move on to the next step, it’s not a good idea to keep hugging the man while he’s between your legs. Sometimes people explicitly confirm that going bare is okay, but often they just go with the flow, so their actions may be mistaken for a yes. Rather than letting things flow into it like a soccer goal, I think it’s more reliable to treat each step separately, like in baseball: oral sex → putting it on → insertion → “ahh♡,” and so on. For someone who tries to force the issue, a triangle choke from guard position is effective. This, along with how to kick a guy in the groin, could practically be taught in compulsory education. Wishing you all the happiness in the world. Though what do I know? Taro

Because HIV, syphilis, and things like that are scary, I always use condoms. I wouldn’t go without one unless I could feel extremely confident and had solid proof that everything was safe. I can’t take that kind of risk. That sounds like a strange dating club. If everyone’s saying they’ll do it bare, maybe that’s what they advertise? You’d probably be better off quitting that club.