There’s a man I haven’t seen for several months because I’ve been back at my parents’ place. We’ve only met once. Would it be okay to reach out and ask if he’d like to meet again when I’m back? He’s probably forgotten about me by now, haha.
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Ideally, I would’ve liked to meet him a few times over a shorter period and deepen our relationship, but family circumstances made that difficult, so my papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) hasn’t been going well. Do men tend to lose interest when things drag on?
If you still want to continue seeing him, I think you should try reaching out.
I also have a woman I met once last year. She told me she had gone back to her parents’ home because of a family matter, and we haven’t been in touch since.
From the man’s perspective, it’s probably less that he’s forgotten you or lost interest because it’s taking too long, and more that he sees it as a roundabout way of turning him down and has moved on.
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They’re the one who decides whether to reply.
You’re the one who decides whether to seize the chance to take that first step.
Simply worrying won’t change anything. I think you should reach out and sincerely explain why you couldn’t contact them, why you couldn’t meet, and what you want to do from here.
Good luck. If you don’t get a reply, just move on to the next person.
Without taking action, nothing in reality will change.
That’s just my personal opinion.
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> Is it okay if I reach out to her?
→ No.
Reason:
I understand that this site serves not only as a place to ask questions, but also as an emotional support outlet. However, there are limits.
Even if it isn’t lengthy, let’s each make the judgment to send thoughtful, sincere messages!
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You say you’ve only met once, but haven’t you been in touch on LINE either?
Try imagining this: if you made an offer and the other person never contacted you, how would you feel?
I think that’s your answer. Still, if you reach out knowing there’s a chance it won’t work, you might get a reply.
For now, just take the initiative.
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I think it’s worth reaching out, even if you’re prepared for the possibility that you may not hear back.
Since suddenly saying you want to meet might feel a little awkward, and they may have forgotten you, you could say something like:
“I’m the person you met in [month], [name].”
“I’ve been busy for a while because of [reason], and I’m sorry we haven’t been able to meet.”
“If you’re available, would you like to meet again?”
If you had a serious reason for returning to your hometown, any explanation should be fine.
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