I’d never found sex pleasurable before and didn’t even know what it felt like to climax, but the papa I met is so good that I climax every time. I’ve also ended up really falling for him.
Is it possible to fall for someone because they’re good in bed? Am I weird?
What should I do about my relationship with my papa…?
He’s unmarried, and there’s only about a 12-year age difference between us. He gives me an allowance of 5 each time.
It’s not strange at all.
There’s no particular reason why people fall for someone…
While many women put up with being intimate with unskilled men for the allowance, you’re lucky to have caught the eye of a skilled man.
That said, I think you should assume that, to him, you’re just one of his casual flings.
If you get too serious, he might leave you.
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I’m in a similar situation to you. I’ve been seeing a papa (a male supporter) who’s 15 years older and exceptionally good in bed, with an allowance, for several years now.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it at all.
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Even in an allowance-based relationship, it won’t be enjoyable unless you both genuinely like each other, so I think it’s fine to keep liking him.
That said, since you seem to be close in age, I think you should proceed cautiously if you’re considering taking things further.
It’s fine to leave your current relationship as it is, but as everyone says, there will always be someone more generous out there, and there may also be “bed yakuza” types. It’s different from a typical romantic relationship, after all.
If you’re comfortable with that and see it as a form of entertainment, then I suppose it’s probably fine.
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Hugging
Having sex
Feeling good
From a hormonal perspective, having sex causes chemicals that make you fall for someone to be released in your brain, so good sex can certainly make you develop feelings.
Why not try going for a relationship with them?
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That’s perfectly fine. Just enjoy it—love him as your papa.
If he’s your papa, he’s good in bed, you’re sexually compatible, and he gives you money, so of course you’re bound to like him.
Just remember that your feelings are based on the money, and because he’s your papa, you can focus purely on deepening your sexual compatibility. It’s completely different from romantic love, where you don’t usually assess sexual compatibility first, so there’s no need to worry.
The man is also first deciding whether to continue based on your sexual compatibility.
I’m sure both you and the man you’re seeing are thinking, “This is amazing—this is fun!” You’re managing to maintain the financial aspect of the relationship, too, and you’re both benefiting each other.
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There are people out there known as “bedroom yakuza.” Could the questioner’s papa (a male supporter) be one of them?
The problem is that, true to the name “yakuza,” many of them have questionable character. Also, people like the questioner may mistake finally being satisfied for being genuinely attracted to someone. Of course, it’s possible that isn’t a misunderstanding.
The first step may be recognizing that men of this type exist. Joe suspects there are far more of them than the questioner imagines. Naturally, Joe is not one of them. Please rest assured.
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That’s wonderful!
I do think it’s possible to fall for someone because they’re great in bed (because you’re sexually compatible). There’s nothing strange about it at all.
When I eventually narrowed things down to one person, it started with our sexual compatibility too. From there, I grew more fond of him, enjoyed talking with him, and came to respect him as a person. Little by little, my feelings deepened until I found myself thinking, “I don’t need anyone but him.”
It started as a physical relationship, but now I feel fulfilled simply by seeing him, regardless of whether we have sex. Honestly, we have sex less often these days. Then again, from the perspective of a conventional romantic relationship, seeing each other and always having sex could also be considered unusual.
If you genuinely want a romantic relationship with him, I think the only option is to increase the satisfaction you both get from the parts of your relationship beyond sex.
That said, he may be perfectly happy with just sex. If that’s the case, perhaps you should set your feelings aside and simply enjoy the great sex.
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