Reading the previous person’s question made me wonder: do most people not do papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan)?

A woman I used to date worked hard and took her part-time job at McDonald’s seriously. It’s not necessarily an either-or choice. Choosing both is perfectly normal.

Could you be talking about one of the college girls I’m seeing through papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan)? She works part-time at a hamburger shop as a cover story to keep up appearances. The person asking this is quite the romantic. P.S. Come to think of it, I’m “Mr. McDonald’s,” so if she went on a date with me and received an allowance, couldn’t she say she “works at McDonald’s”? Since Mr. Taro loves puns, I searched for “Taro part-time job” on his behalf and found all kinds of results, like Ankake Taro, Shabu-Shabu Taro, Yakiniku Taro, Tonkatsu Taro, and Sakana Taro. LOL.

That’s a good question—and a difficult one, so it’s not easy to answer. I think what matters is understanding the various circumstances and positions surrounding you, then acting based on the person you want to be and the life you want to lead. If you do that, whether you work at a hamburger shop or at a club in Kabukicho, I think either is fine. Your surroundings may be completely different, but if you value yourself and act with purpose, the outcome can be the same. That said, people are easily influenced by their environment. If you’re not careful, you may simply go with the flow and eventually become someone very different from the person you thought you would be. That’s something to watch out for.

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with you as the person asking the question. And there’s nothing wrong with the woman who works at the hamburger shop, either. Who we are today is shaped by our personality, environment, past experiences, and all kinds of other factors. I hope you’ll respect the feelings you honestly have. That said, if you realize that expressing your true feelings too openly can sometimes lead to unexpectedly negative reactions, then learning how to handle situations skillfully and avoid conflict is also an important part of getting through life. People normally don’t have affairs, right? If you’re seriously dating someone, you normally get married, right? Parents normally love their children, right? “Normally,” “normally,” “normally”… There’s really no such thing as “normal.” Rather than worrying about what’s “normal,” I think it’s better to focus on how to express who you are while living your life, and move forward with both flexibility and strength.