When you’re active in a dating club, you sometimes meet women whose bed manners make it obvious they’ve probably worked in the adult entertainment industry. Rather than enjoying the relationship, it feels transactional and work-like, which is disappointing when you joined the club to meet women outside that line of work. I use things like whether they have a daytime job and what hours they’re available as some of my criteria, but what do you all look for in a profile when trying to determine whether someone is involved in the adult entertainment industry? Conversely, if you’ve dated a woman with that kind of experience and found ways to enjoy the relationship, I’d love to hear about them. Thank you.

It’s difficult to tell from a profile. And when it comes to bed, Fuu often can’t tell whether a woman has good manners from working in the adult entertainment industry or whether another papa or boyfriend taught her. Maybe you should simply appreciate her skills, thinking that being with her would be better than being with someone who just lies there like a dead fish. A woman with that much experience will probably be willing to accommodate various requests, too. Lately, Fuu has been setting terms like: “I’m well-endowed, and I want standing doggy style in front of a mirror, plus a second round.” As a result, his monthly arrangement partners have turned into a group of very erotic women. Alternatively, if you send out lots of offers, I think you’ll eventually meet women who match your preferences. Being able to date all kinds of women is one of the fun parts of this, too.

To put it simply, Joe doesn’t mind. I haven’t asked her, but the woman I’ve been seeing the longest probably has some experience working in the adult entertainment industry. The other day, while we were having dinner in her hometown, we decided to go to a hotel afterward. She said, “Leave it to me,” and led me to the hotel district. After passing several hotels, she said, “This one is clean, and the bathtub is spacious,” and walked right in. Once we got to the room, I couldn’t help but chuckle when she hung the key from the doorknob, though. What’s great about her is that she’s considerate toward Joe, including when it comes to intimacy. If you focus solely on her bedroom skills, you might lose interest, but if you also judge whether she’s considerate as a person and whether you’re compatible, you may be able to enjoy the relationship. I hope this helps.

If you’re a Platinum or Black member, it’s safest to inquire in advance. If you’re a Standard or Gold member, you can avoid quite a few encounters by writing in the notes when making an offer: “I’d prefer to avoid women with experience working in the adult entertainment industry—is that okay?” That said, there’s no way to screen for this 100%, so naturally, you may sometimes realize it only after making the offer. I generally don’t accept women who work in the adult entertainment industry either, but once in the past, I only found out after making an offer because the woman disclosed it herself. By the way, many women in that line of work are quite genuine, and they tend to be satisfied even with a relatively low allowance. So if someone asked me, “Would you rather date a professional papa-katsu girl or a woman who works in the adult entertainment industry?” I think I’d choose the latter. I’d rather avoid someone who’s jaded. As for how to enjoy the relationship, just because she works in that industry doesn’t mean things will be particularly different—she’s still just another woman.

I’m also firmly against dating anyone who works in the sex industry. Since it isn’t always listed in their profile, I make a point of confirming it when I send an offer. It actually applies fairly often. That said, some girls don’t disclose it during the interview. Those who don’t care much whether it’s a hotel or a meal, don’t ask for a particularly large allowance, but are very conscious of the time and seem accustomed to this—almost proactively suggesting things themselves—often fall into that category. (Since the establishment takes a cut, the hourly rate in the sex industry isn’t necessarily higher than the allowance at a club, even at upscale venues.) Even when I think someone is especially suspicious, I don’t turn her down the first time. You can usually tell by the way she goes about things, but I just treat it as if I’ve gone to a sex-service establishment for the first time in a while, enjoy myself by asking for things I don’t normally do, and then end it after the first meeting or, at most, one more.

Ah, then that may just be a misunderstanding. You haven’t actually confirmed it with her, have you? Some people approach this as a transactional relationship, and others don’t. But that doesn’t mean everyone who does is a sex worker. And even among sex workers, there are those still active and those who have retired. So stop casually labeling people and actually get to know the person you’re dealing with. As for women who are strictly transactional, club staff will often comment if they notice. Beyond that, make your own judgment based on sources where you can see the woman’s genuine reactions, such as videos, Q&A answers, and comments. Also, anyone who thinks they’re perfect is a complete idiot. The world works on probability. No matter how careful you are, you’re bound to take a hit now and then. Anyone who doesn’t understand that probably isn’t cut out for exploring. Stay in the rear and play it safe on paved roads instead of going to the front lines. Sex work is a business where women’s bodies are subjected to all kinds of things, so they come out wearing armor. But once you get that armor off, they can actually be more devoted and innocent than ordinary women. Even outside the sex industry, there are plenty of women whose past experiences have left them with baggage. Once they overcome their trauma, they may finally open up. So if you’re looking for a woman with whom you can build a proper relationship, whether she has sex-work experience shouldn’t be the issue. If you want to enjoy a nice balance of seeming like a regular girl and a pseudo-romance that goes the way you want, you should look for someone ranging from an amateur to a genuine professional in the hostess/bar scene. I’d say there are about as many of them as Fits or Swift Sports in the used-car market. Someone who actively updates her profile and so on is probably a good choice. If you pick someone whose comments suggest she’s into playing the role of a lover, your odds of finding a good match should improve. Adult video actresses in a similar field might also be worth considering. Once you get close, their reactions during intimacy can be incredible. If you can draw out a performance beyond what she shows in her work, it can be very satisfying. Practically speaking, they also get regular STI tests paid for by their agency every month, so it’s safer. And if you happen to get infected yourself, they may be more understanding because they’re experienced. It’s also quietly fun being able to joke around with them at a level of dirty talk one step beyond what you can do with ordinary women. What were we talking about again? Oh—does this actually answer the question? Haha. Then I guess we’re good. That’s all from the field. Thanks for your hard work(^^) Taro

Above all, don’t feel disappointed. You could look at it positively: thanks to that experience, the next woman may seem even better, or if you already have a favorite, you can stop wasting offers on others and focus on her. It’s hard to avoid a person to avoid based on their profile alone. In your case, try bringing up the allowance before meeting—or after you meet. If she readily tells you the amount she wants, I think it’s fair to take that as a sign. Even if she doesn’t, you can at least assume she has some experience, familiarity with clubs, or a shrewd understanding of how things work.