I’m exchanging emails with someone through Letter Date, but it’s becoming really tedious.
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I sent several messages saying “You seem wonderful,” but since I can’t message the man who sent me the Letter Date offer directly, he replied, “I sent you a Letter Date offer.”
Honestly, I don’t need all these messages—I just want him to meet me.
After that, he started sending messages like “I’m off to work,” “I have such-and-such tomorrow,” “I’m home,” and “I’m bored on my day off, so message me.” It’s getting really, really exhausting.
I messaged him, “I’d like to meet and talk in person,” but he ignored it.
I’m wondering whether I have to keep emailing him forever before he’ll meet me, or whether he never intended to meet and is just using this to kill time. I’m not sure what to do…
Since I received the offer, I’d like to meet him, but my expectations aren’t very high.
Should I exchange messages with him a little longer and see how things go?}ಿಸಿದ್ದಾರೆ เดิมพันฟรี! sexleketøy? This must be a valid JSON but final appears weird? Need only format. Ensure no stray. Also perhaps title truncated original intentionally. Need translate exact title ending
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂Not stated👑Universe female member
Thank you for your question.
This is Kurosaki from the Kansai Unit answering.
I recently answered another question about letter dates, and we do receive a fair number of similar comments from women. Also, when he went out of his way to say, “I offered a letter date because I can’t message you directly,” it sounded to me like he was trying to make excuses and say that he didn’t choose a letter date just because the setting fee would be cut in half.
As for what to do next, you might want to contact him once more about scheduling the date. If he still doesn’t give you a clear answer, it may be best to let it go.
If you would prefer not to receive any more letter-date offers in the future, please contact the club.
Your chances may be slim, but I hope things work out and that you develop a good relationship!
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If a man says he’s only looking for an online pen pal, I don’t think he’s actually planning to meet in person (´；ω；｀)
I’m the type who likes to start with a “letter date” to get a feel for his personality and see how well we click in conversation before meeting, so I can feel comfortable.
But if, after meeting once, I feel like he’s only keeping me around as an online chatting buddy, I say goodbye (>_<)
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> I sent him a message saying, “I’d like to meet and talk in person,” but he ignored it.
If he’s ignored you, I think it’s best to end things there and block him.
Continuing to exchange messages probably won’t get you much, and even if you do meet, I feel like he may then start pushing for “dinner only.”
The best thing is not to waste your time on men like that.
By the way, if the initial exchange has already been established, you don’t have to reply afterward, and it won’t affect your rating.
(That said, I’d appreciate it if you could at least let him know something like, “I won’t be replying anymore because I’m no longer interested in meeting.”)
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I’m Yoshino, a female member.
I understand how you feel. It’s impressive that you’re replying so thoughtfully—good job, and hang in there.
I think the best thing is to tell him honestly how you feel right now. That’s what I’ve always done.
There is, however, a key point in how you say it. If it comes across as, “How dare you waste a girl’s precious time without even paying her! Make time for me already!” he’ll lose interest and run away. So I never show that side—I take the long way around.
① “What do you like about me, Mr. ○○? What was it that caught your interest? Why do you message me? ♡”
→ Draw out his feelings and find out what he really thinks of you. I spend plenty of time here, encouraging him to tell me as many things as possible that he likes about me.
② Don’t press him yet, even if he responds well.
→ “...Really?? You hardly ever come to see me, so I started worrying that you might dislike me, or that you find messaging me boring. It made me really sad... (;_;)”
③ Use a needy, emotionally manipulative push-pull tactic.
→ “The more we message, the more I’ve started to develop feelings for you... But you’re probably popular, Mr. ○○, so maybe you’re meeting and hanging out with other girls while messaging me too. I can’t help wondering if that’s why you won’t meet me, and it makes me feel lonely.”
④ Once he starts to waver, honestly tell him you want to meet.
→ After building up his feelings sufficiently, tell him directly and sincerely, “I want to see you.”
Men like this probably either aren’t used to dealing with women or aren’t very good at picking up on other people’s feelings. Unless you clearly express, “This is how I feel right now!!” it probably won’t get through. If it were me, I’d send lots of emotionally needy messages and take the lead in the conversation. With someone who’s being difficult, I think it’s best to become even more difficult yourself, reverse the power dynamic, and deal with him that way.
It may be tough, but I hope you get to meet him. I’m rooting for you. ♡
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They don’t seem interested in meeting, so waiting to see how things develop would probably be pointless—and even if you did meet, they sound like they’d be a hassle.
I’ve only done a letter date once myself, but after exchanging greetings, I sent the allowance via LINE Pay right away. We asked each other a few questions, arranged a date, and met up. Naturally, I also gave them transportation money when we met for the first time.
Compared with that, this person’s lack of enthusiasm really stands out.
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Apparently, some men only want to exchange messages.
They pay a low setting fee and get to LINE girls for free—what a creepy, delusional old guy.
If he’s bothering you, first let the staff know, then have him send your LINE allowance via PayPay and message him, “Goodbye.”
Even exchanging LINE messages isn’t free, you know.
You want to tell him, “I’m not sitting around with nothing better to do.”
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Since this person keeps avoiding meeting up, it’s probably pointless either way. The person asking the question already thinks you’re too much trouble, lol. You’re just not a good match, lol.
If they can’t even match your pace from the start, they’ll just leave you behind again even if things move forward, lol.
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Since he’s spending money to make an offer, he probably isn’t just trying to kill time.
My guess is that he’s the type who wants to get to know each other before meeting.
If he understood the mindset of women registered with dating clubs, he’d realize that dragging out messages before meeting only works against him…
Thinking about it that way, he may not be very experienced with dating clubs.
Depending on how you handle things, he might become really interested in you.
If you’re not getting many offers, it might be worth thinking about what kind of conversation would make this man want to meet you.
You may have stumbled across a surprisingly generous (well-paying) papa here, haha.
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So he replied to your “Nice profile with a message!” with a letter-date offer, right? In a way, he sounds like a very serious and sincere person, but…
If he won’t meet you, then from your perspective, no allowance will come of it, and you’re left wondering what the point is. I could understand if he lived far away, but if he’s nearby, you might start wondering whether he was simply looking for a friend to exchange emails with.
If it were me, I’d consider it a valuable connection and give it a little more time. Not everyone who receives a “Nice profile with a message!” will contact you, after all. I’d ask what he likes, suggest going to a particular restaurant, and keep making it clear that I’d like to meet him.
Since he went out of his way to send you an offer, I doubt he has no intention of meeting you at all. I’d continue until you reach the point where you can’t take it anymore. If you feel you’ve had enough, it’s perfectly fine to tell him, “If we can’t meet, I won’t be able to continue contacting you.”
This isn’t charity work, after all. Still, you can thank him for sending the letter-date offer and say goodbye.
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People who are a hassle to deal with over messages are often a hassle to deal with in person, too.
You might be willing to continue seeing someone if they had something that made up for that, but I wouldn’t expect much from a man who makes someone he isn’t even giving an allowance to put up with endless pointless messages.
By the way, is this even a question? You just want the other users answering to sympathize with you, don’t you? Since you’re a hassle too, I guess you’re even.
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