Female respondents: Would you be put off if your papa had gray hair down there?

It doesn’t bother me at all, haha. I guess it depends on the person… If it really bothers you, why not just get it waxed or removed and go completely smooth?

Women are probably paying attention to a lot more than that. Things like the condition of your skin, a sagging stomach, nose hair, eyebrows, your hairstyle, your clothes, and the way you speak to restaurant staff. I think they see it as just one of many things they notice. So even if there’s some gray hair down there, they already see you as an older man in the first place. It probably just registers as, “Well, I guess that’s normal.” I haven’t heard many stories of someone being put off specifically because of that, so it likely ends there. If anything, I hear more complaints about other aspects, so you should be especially careful about how you treat service staff. If you think you’re fine just because you’re kind to women, but act arrogant toward staff, you should assume they’ll see that alone as a deal-breaker.

I think you’re the only one who’s really bothered by it—not the woman. You can solve the problem by having sex in the dark and not asking her to give you oral. Lately, I’ve started noticing a few white hairs in my nose. Little by little, different parts of me are turning gray.

It doesn’t bother me at all. I’d find it stranger if someone had gray hair on their head but no gray hair down there, with everything still jet-black. Marika

Not at all. Someone who smells is way more of a turn-off. Akari

So you’re doing intimate things in a fairly brightly lit room, huh? For some reason, most of the women I’m with prefer dim lighting, so I usually can’t even tell what color their pubic hair is. When the woman has dark skin, she can genuinely disappear into the darkness, leaving me in a hot-pot-of-mystery situation where I have no idea what I’m touching. There have even been times when I didn’t notice bruises on someone’s body until years later. I think there’s something wonderful about being close enough to observe every detail of each other’s bodies under good lighting. When I was little, my mother was worried about her gray hair. Whenever she found one, she’d call me over and ask me to pull it out. I remember thinking, “If I keep plucking all those gray hairs that grow in place of black ones, won’t she go bald? Maybe that’s why old people are bald,” while obediently pulling them out. I’ll never forget the little “pop” I felt when the roots being tugged broke through the skin. Why didn’t she just pull them out herself? Maybe she was trying to teach me something by sacrificing herself. I still have no idea what it was. Incidentally, my mother is still doing well. She’s doing too well and is annoying, so I don’t want to ask her. If I ever get one last chance to talk to her on her deathbed, I think I’ll end the conversation with that question lol. You should take care of your pubic hair. I don’t remove mine, but I do groom it. My goal is a perfectly manicured English garden—the kind you’d see in Alice in Wonderland(^^). In the process, I analyzed in detail which parts of my balls have what kind of hair growth patterns, so I’m planning to enter it for next year’s Ig Nobel Prize. I hadn’t considered the gray-hair issue, but I did spend quite a while worrying about what hairstyle to give my pubic hair. I thought it might be funny to style it like my icon, so I tried using super-hard gel. Unfortunately, the erotic minister I’m currently dating doesn’t understand jokes and tends to take everything literally, desperately trying to come up with a perfect 100-point answer, so I feel like I might erase one of her best qualities. Still, there are other sexy women out there, so maybe I should go through with it even if it means ruining the relationship. I’m seriously torn about it（笑） What were we talking about again? Oh, right—whether women care about gray pubic hair. If it bothers you, just get it removed. If you were talking about removing the hair on your head, I’d tell you to hold on a second. I’ve always wanted to have an afro someday, while also becoming someone who can work harder than anyone else despite having one. So for now, I’m working hard because I figure work comes before the afro. I think all men secretly feel the same way, which is why I said to leave the hair on your head alone. But since I have no plans to give my pubic hair an afro, who cares anymore? If it bothers you, stop fussing and wipe it out. Become Qin Shi Huang, who didn’t mind being called a butcher for the greater cause of unifying the realm, and get fiercely waxed. Taro

If you get medical hair removal and go completely smooth, you won’t worry about it anymore. Please go as soon as possible, before it turns white.

I want to put it in a vagina, not in a man in his 40s—but seriously, don’t use the kanji for “hair.” You should write “white hair.” Since 髪 is read as *kaminoke*, it specifically means the hair on your head. “Kaminoke” means “hair up top”; it’s not one of Taro’s favorite silly puns. That’s genuinely where the word comes from. From the wording of the question, I picture the head of a distinguished gray-haired gentleman suddenly poking out from someone’s crotch. Of course that would be off-putting. More than anything, it’s just creepy, so please don’t write weird Japanese like that lol. Going off on a tangent, did you know that the term “romance gray” is said to have been coined by Sony founder Akio Morita? If this tangent keeps rolling like a runaway train, that would be scary too, so I’ll stop here. But we were talking about what female respondents would think, right? What is this supposed to be—a consultation about straddling the older guy in the next seat at a party, sticking his white head out from your crotch, and saying, “Presenting: the topknot,” while putting a penis on top of his head? Obviously not lol. If you make it, “I’ll give you ¥10,000 for every white hair you find and pluck,” people will be delighted. Though the white hairs would probably disappear in no time. Come to think of it, Mokichi Saito wrote a sentimental poem: “When I was in Munich, late at night I cut off a white hair from my pubic region and threw it away.” Since so many Germans are blond, he could have taken it positively and thought, “Wow, thanks to living in Germany, I’m becoming more European now.” But I guess his Japanese spirit was just too strong. Also, white pubic hairs are actually more common among women. Apparently quite a few women start getting them in their 30s. I wonder why—maybe hormones? For the record, I’m over 60, but I genuinely don’t have a single white one down there. It’s still shiny. I just checked because I was curious. Don’t make me do weird things like that lol. I thought this question was right up Taro’s alley, so I tried writing it in the Taro style, but somehow it didn’t feel right. I guess imitating the original is difficult. Maybe I should take a step back and become Mac Jiro instead. Now I’m craving ramen—wait, that’s Jiro lol.

It doesn’t put me off at all. I’m seeing him because I like him, so something like that doesn’t bother me.

I wouldn’t be put off. Everyone’s hair eventually turns gray, so I don’t think there’s any point in worrying about it.

This is something I’d been wondering about too, but once I actually started seeing someone, it just came down to, “I have some gray hair,” and that was it（笑）. I really don’t think you need to worry about it at all. Ah! Maybe that’s just me（笑）.