The questioner is getting absolutely slammed, but I also don’t like seeing lipstick marks on a glass.
I think she should wipe them off with a tissue in the restroom before the meal. The reason it bothers me is that makeup is supposed to be something men don’t notice. It feels like showing me the behind-the-scenes work.
Also, I find it hard to accept the egotistical attitude of thinking, “If my face looks pretty, who cares if I dirty the glass?”
It’s not enough to make me dislike her as a person, but if you ask whether I like or dislike it, it’s definitely a mannerism I tend to dislike.
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How perfect do you think you are yourself?
The more you think you’ve got it all together, the more likely it is that you actually don’t.
It’s like how the people who say, “You look younger than your age,” are often the ones who look exactly their age.
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I use a lip tint and have permanent makeup along my lip line, so I never wipe it off. But I had no idea that not wiping it off was considered good manners!
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Wiping the rim of a glass with your finger isn’t considered good manners. And wiping it with a napkin after drinking doesn’t look particularly graceful either.
To keep too much lipstick from getting on the glass, I gently blot my lips with a tissue beforehand. Even so, a little still transfers, which makes me want to wipe it off—but wiping it with a pristine white napkin also feels disrespectful to the restaurant.
I hope you can understand that not completely removing my lipstick is simply a woman’s way of wanting to look at least a little more attractive for the person sitting across from her.
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Are you, the questioner, so impeccable in appearance—including your grooming and cleanliness—and manners that you’re in a position to point this out to women?
Do you have flawless, smooth skin without a single blemish, a six-pack, never spit when you talk, and the perfect vocabulary of a handsome, sophisticated older man?
Unless you’re truly that perfect—or have the generosity to think, “We’re both human”—I don’t think you can enjoy this kind of relationship.
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I think you may be overthinking it.
I’m in my 30s, and among the ordinary people around my age, hardly anyone goes that far. You do occasionally come across people like that at clubs in Ginza, though.
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Wiping lipstick off a glass with your finger or even a napkin is generally considered bad manners.
Your question is actually the embarrassing one. You seem like the kind of person who would call it “lazy” if a woman showed up without lipstick, yet nitpick the results of her taking the time to do her makeup properly.
Why not offer to meet someone with a bit of social experience—someone who knows to choose lipstick that doesn’t transfer easily or lightly blot it with tissue beforehand?
Akari
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I think that woman is probably more interested in this and that about you. Is this a tongue-in-cheek question meant to invite all the female respondents to chime in with teasing comments?
Also, when I read the first half of the question, I thought it was going to be something like, “When I see a glass with lipstick marks on it, I get an urge to lick it clean. Am I a pervert?”
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