I was uncomfortable when someone wanted to kiss me right after drinking coffee and smoking. Am I being too sensitive?
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I don’t smoke, so it bothered me.
He was fairly old, so I wonder whether the women he’d been with before were okay with it—or maybe he just hadn’t had much experience…
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂Not stated👑Universe female member
I’m a terrible old guy who drinks coffee and alcohol and smokes, too.
But I’m still seeing one particular woman. I do try to make sure I don’t smell when I get close to her, though (lol). She’s never told me to go away because I stink, but I might smell a little.
I do think she may be a bit sensitive, but I agree that other people’s smells can seem unpleasant—even to me (lol).
Still, without pushing too hard, you could try telling him, “You seem like a nice guy, but you do smell a little.” He might start being more careful.
If he can’t deal with that, it’s unfortunate, but maybe it’s best to part ways...
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People who smoke while walking leave a trail of smoke that reeks for about 10 meters behind them.
I have no choice but to speed up and pass them, which is such a hassle.
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Once, a patient secretly went off the premises to smoke and came back. Even though they’d only passed by for a second, I could smell the cigarettes—and they got caught.
People who smoke and drink coffee have breath that smells like shit.
It’s a public nuisance. Seriously, please stop.
Stop the shit parade. ༼ ຶｰ ຶ༽
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Since they’re personal indulgences, I think coffee and cigarettes are fine—but kissing right afterward is a no-go, haha.
If there’s kissing involved, I assume you’re already at a hotel. Normally, people are considerate enough to brush their teeth first ∠( ˙-˙ )／
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> I didn’t like it when someone drank coffee, smoked, and then immediately wanted to kiss me. Am I being too sensitive?
I don’t think so.
If you don’t smoke yourself, quite a few women find even the smell of cigarettes unpleasant.
Regardless of kissing, when someone who smokes gets close to you, the smell of tobacco comes from their entire body, which can be difficult to tolerate. But smokers often seem to have no awareness of it—they may genuinely wonder, “You can still smell it even though I’m not smoking right now?”
The same goes for e-cigarettes.
That said, in this case, it was the combination of cigarettes, coffee, and kissing.
You could simply refuse the kiss. They’ll probably ask something like, “Why?” so you can explain that you’re uncomfortable with that combination.
You were probably also asked during the interview whether you smoke, and at that time, you could have asked whether you’re okay with men smoking.
It might affect the number of offers you receive, but you could contact the staff and ask them to add something like this to your profile:
【Smoking】I don’t smoke, and I can’t be around men who smoke either.
That way, even smokers will probably refrain from smoking during the date. And if a man didn’t notice that detail, you can still say that you’re sensitive to cigarette smoke, which should help avoid situations involving the coffee-and-cigarette combination.
Alternatively, you could write something like this in a comments section where you can add your own notes:
“I’m uncomfortable with drinking coffee, smoking, and then kissing right afterward.”
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They don’t realize it themselves.
Even when you just pass by them, you can smell the cigarettes and the coffee.
When the two mix, it’s the worst.
I don’t think you’re being overly sensitive.
Akari
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That’s perfectly normal.
If anything, I think it’s better that you notice it.
When a guy who’s been drinking coffee or barley tea without taking care of his teeth comes and sits next to you, the smell can be pretty strong.
Even worse, when someone at work comes back in after smoking outside, they probably have no idea that I’m desperately holding my breath and trying to endure it. The smell lingers for quite a long time, doesn’t it?
> People who smoke while walking leave a smell for about 10 meters behind them, don’t they?
> It’s a pain because the only option is to speed up and pass them.
Having to pass them—or stop and wait for them to get farther away—walking smokers really need to quit.
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Teachers’ lounges and offices always seemed to have that distinctive cigarette-and-coffee smell, didn’t they? I’ve always found it difficult to tolerate.
But one person I met here didn’t smell at all, even right after smoking and drinking coffee. I could sit close to him and even kiss him afterward without being bothered in the slightest!
Still, he was the only one like that, so I wonder whether it was just his body chemistry or if he had some special trick.
If it really bothers you, I think your only options are to tell him honestly or, unfortunately, end things.
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Cigarettes + coffee
is the absolute worst smell, isn’t it? Unbearable.
I love coffee too, but I never drink it before or during a date. Of course, I don’t smoke either, and if I have even the slightest concern about my breath or body odor, I won’t go anywhere near a woman—within a five-meter radius.
Edit:
After seeing her off at the hotel, the coffee I have in the room tastes absolutely amazing.
Edit 2:
> “It smells like sh*t…”
Nanapota-san, lol.
But this really is true, isn’t it? Even as a man, when I meet someone who smells like cigarettes and coffee, it literally smells like poop. Women who smoke and drink coffee are just barely tolerable, but when it’s some old guy, it’s practically a public health hazard...
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I do think I’m a bit particular.
If I like someone, I’ll naturally kiss her as part of the moment. I’ve even been told, “It tastes like coffee, haha.” Brushing your teeth first would probably be cleaner, but some women don’t, and somehow that tells me they approach things a little differently. For me, it’s definitely one of the signs that she might be “a good one.”
That said, there are certainly women who are very particular about cleanliness and have strict standards in that regard. So if you don’t like it, I think it’s perfectly fine to simply say so. From a man’s perspective, it means having to look for another way to gauge how serious a woman is, but it’s not really a major issue. Besides, even regarding the original point, there are women in the adult entertainment industry who work at places where certain intimate services are available right away, so the reality is that you can’t always know what’s genuine in this world.
When it comes to succeeding as a freelancer, people often say the first requirement is to establish your own rules. I think the same applies to women active in dating clubs.
Taro
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