I’m the girl who posted earlier asking about having my beauty expenses covered.
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Thank you all for sharing so many opinions in response to my question.
I’d like to share my thoughts after reading everyone’s answers.
The most common suggestion seemed to be to avoid explicitly calling it “beauty expenses,” and instead approach the subject indirectly.
But personally, my first thought was: It’s exhausting having to be so careful just to avoid sounding like I’m making an awkward request…
To be a little more specific, it’s not that I find being considerate difficult because I’m thinking about the other person. The process of achieving my goal of having my beauty expenses covered is mentally quite exhausting.
I do understand the indirect suggestions and the idea of using my allowance for that purpose, as some people mentioned in their answers.
But I find that kind of roundabout relationship painful, which is why I think I’m asking for the money explicitly as “beauty expenses.”
I’m probably not very “savvy” when it comes to the papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) market.
Was it selfish of me to hope that having my beauty expenses covered could be a win-win for both the girl and the papa? (laughs) Though, to begin with, wanting an allowance specifically for beauty expenses is an extremely personal selfish request of mine (hehe).
Also, to Kazu:
Thank you for sharing your honest opinion.
It was the most helpful to me personally, so I wanted to mention it. I think I’ll take some time to figure out whether each person is more of a logic-driven “adult relationship (intimate)” type or an emotional, personality-focused type, while also working out the specific benefits in my head.
Still… making money is hard.
Some of the other girls who answered said they could relate to wanting beauty expenses covered, so let’s both do our best.
And if you have any mindset advice that could help me become a savvier girl in papa-katsu, I’d really appreciate it if you could share it again.
Thank you.
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂20s👑Member of another dating club
Personally, I’d say, “Just make it work within the allowance” (lol).
You’re free to spend the allowance however you like. How you break it down is entirely up to you.
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Sorry, I can’t really relate since I don’t spend money on beauty.
Lately, I’ve even stopped buying high-end department-store skincare products.
Even if I did need money for beauty expenses, I’d probably just say, “It takes effort and money to look this good!” when someone tells me I’m pretty.
Cute girls are cute even without spending money, especially those in their twenties.
Good luck.
Marika
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Rather than asking my papa for money for beauty treatments, I was thinking he might pay if I told him I wanted to make him happy by getting the “thousand earthworms” treatment.
You can look up what “thousand earthworms” means. Is it only available at clinics in Tokyo?
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It’s not just a matter of saying the right thing. When I pay for beauty treatments, buy presents, or cover everyday expenses beyond the allowance, I’m not doing it as an investment. It’s my way of showing sincerity in response to what I receive from her—not anything tangible. So I have no intention of trying to recoup it.
I feel the same way about the allowance.
With an ordinary business investment, you’d have to recover your money, but for me, at least, this isn’t that kind of thing.
People who demand their presents or allowance back may see it as an investment, though.
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Beauty costs money, doesn’t it? (´；ω；｀)
I can’t exactly lie and say, “I don’t do anything!” (lol)
Still, as you get older, life might become even more financially difficult than it is now. It might be a good idea to keep that possibility in mind as a reality… (Advice from an older lady.)
It’s pretty hard to outright ask for beauty expenses separately, though. ヾ(⌒(_*･ω･)_
Maybe girls work hard where no one can see them. (I’m writing this while doing sit-ups.)
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Rather than expecting one papa (a male supporter) to provide everything, I think it’s better to steadily build a lineup of “specialist papas,” such as:
- Cash papa
- Dinner papa
- Beauty-expense papa
- Shopping papa
That’s what I do.
In my case, they’re:
- Satisfying to keep around (my ace)
- Simple dates (an A-type girl)
- Skilled in bed
- Kinky
- Golf
- Extremely close (a former ace)
- Eye candy (a nail technician)
That’s more or less how it is.
If you expect one person to fulfill every role, it ends up costing ¥200,000+ a month. And even if you’re the one who rejects them, the emotional damage when things end is huge, so I date multiple people and assign them different roles.
In your case, I’d suggest looking for a beauty-expense papa.
Another papa I had besides my former ace would cover unlimited beauty expenses.
You could try looking for a papa with a profile along the lines of:
“Receiving my allowance in cash makes things feel too transactional and lonely, so I’d be happy if you could support me with beauty expenses only.”
By the way, I’m a papa who combines the roles of:
Cash papa + beauty-expense papa
I’m not very good at shopping or dining dates, though.
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Women’s beauty treatments are the male equivalent of visiting sex workers. It’s just a way of satisfying desire.
It’s the same as a papa (a male supporter) or boyfriend saying, “I’m going to train at a brothel, become a sex pro, and make you come nonstop.” If you’re going to do it, just go quietly.
There’s not much difference between a man honing his sexual technique and a woman making herself more beautiful. Don’t show people what goes on backstage or behind the scenes—it kills the mood.
You can use your allowance however you want, and I have no problem with you making yourself more beautiful, but just show the results. Don’t show the process.
Besides, your papa is satisfied because he likes you as you are now, right? Wanting to become even more beautiful can come across as wanting to be liked by an even more generous (well-paying) papa. Why should he pay for you to present yourself to other papas?
Sorry to rain on your parade, but most women don’t understand the true nature of “beauty.” Just like appetite and sexual desire, it’s a fundamental urge. So flaunting it like that is unbecoming. Anyone who thinks they can logically explain “what benefits becoming beautiful will bring” is missing the point. I just poured a bucket of cold water over your head there, lol.
Anyway, I’m not against beauty treatments, but do them discreetly. Telling your papa, “Give me money because I want to spend it on beauty treatments♡” isn’t much different from a child telling their parents, “Give me allowance because I want to buy an erotic magazine.”
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I’m Potassium, a female member.
After reading this question, I found myself thinking, “I like the person who asked this!” lol. The fact that she keeps a household budget while doing this made me feel that she’s really sincere… It made me want to support her.
I also learned a few things from the question, so thank you.
I understand how exhausting it can be to worry about the other person’s feelings.
(I’m going to write my own personal theory here, and it’s a bit long and emotional.)
Of course, deep down, I’d like to receive money to help me look beautiful, and I’d love for my papa (a male supporter) to invest in my appearance and beauty. But he isn’t my husband, and I’m just a young woman who will eventually move on. I also understand that I can’t repay all the money I receive in the end, so I don’t make demands or ask for things… The mashed potatoes at Wolfgang’s were the first thing I ever asked for, though lol.
(After reading this answer, you may have thought, “So this is her failed strategy!” But I always do papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) based solely on my own beliefs, so this is really just my personal self-satisfaction.)
The thing I value most is always thinking about what my papa finds valuable in being with me, and what I can give back in return.
In our relationship, it seems that he finds value in the time we spend together and feels fulfilled by having briefly become part of each other’s lives. (That’s how I came to focus on emotional connection.) So I accept that the mental stress involved is necessary in order to provide him with a kind of value that money can’t buy.
I’m the type of person who wants to give something back for whatever I receive, and I think there’s nothing more dangerous and self-destructive than taking it for granted that you deserve to be given things…
What I’m trying to say is: if you want to make money, stress is inevitable!
Ultimately, I believe papa-katsu is about a papa turning the valuable time and feelings he receives into money as a thank-you.
So I always have to remember to be grateful to my papa.
Jiroon… I can’t organize my thoughts at all. I’m stupid, after all.
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I’m glad you found it helpful.
Most women cover their beauty expenses out of their allowance, so asking for that separately is just being selfish, in my opinion（笑）.
If going through all the indirect steps is painful for you, I think your best chance of surviving is to be in the intimacy category. That said, unless you’re willing to showcase a decent level of technique, women in that category won’t be able to continue the arrangement either, so it’s certainly not easy.
Good luck.
As an aside, one interesting thing about dating clubs is that some women have never worked in the adult entertainment industry, but were taught a decent level of technique by past boyfriends.
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