Tips
Aug 20, 2022 21:06
16 answers
A～Dまで一通りオファーの経験あり、多くても月１程度でLINEはスケジュール調整のみ、スマートに無理なく長期交際するスタイルです。
Age: 50s
👨 Male
Universe member
Simply put, it’s just that the person you’re seeing behaves that way.
There are two possibilities.
One is that the issue lies with you; the other is that it lies with the woman you’re seeing.
If it’s the former, she may simply not want to spend much time with you.
It might be worth considering whether you’ve done anything that could make women dislike you.
If it’s the latter, some women at dating clubs meet men strictly based on an hourly rate.
Personally, I feel that type A and type D women tend to be like that more often.
Maybe type A and type D aren’t very popular because many men get that impression.
That said, not all women are like that, so I recommend meeting more of the other women as well.
🏅 日没を遅らせる唯一の方法は日没に向かって走り続けることだ
名古屋支店登録で、男性会員としての登録名もマックさんです。コラム多数書いてますのでよろしければご参照ください。20代の細身女性が好みで逆オファーには前向きです。経験無いまたは少ない方大歓迎。
Age: 60s
👨 Male
Universe member
Isn’t it simply about things like a curfew or the last train?
Before a date, I always ask, along with the meeting time, “What time do you need to be home by?” It’s essential.
Then, if you want to enjoy lingering afterward, plan the date so you have enough time for that.
I think that’s what being considerate of the other person means.
The person asking the question and I may have plenty of free time, but that isn’t necessarily true for the girls.
🏅 あなたの味方
お役に立てれば幸いです。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe staff
Some women do set an alarm, but that’s not something people normally do.
So if women are doing this with you, I get the feeling there may be an issue on your end. Perhaps you keep trying to go again, so the terms include something like “two hours,” or maybe you’re the one making time part of the terms in exchange for getting them to accept a lower allowance.
It also seems possible that time is being discussed as part of the arrangement. If you haven’t talked about time when discussing the terms, then perhaps you simply spend too long at the hotel, or there’s some other reason they don’t want to stay with you for very long.
If that’s the case, unless you address the underlying cause, the same thing may continue happening. But that would mean the problem lies with you.
If it’s difficult for you to improve on your own, I think you’d be better off pursuing papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) somewhere else.
🏅 プロおぢ。ほんとはプロパパと名乗りたいけど名乗るほどの実力がない名古屋の汚っさんです。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe member
Using a timer is perfectly normal. I’m the one who sets it, though. The only time I don’t use one is when I’m on a date with my girlfriend.
With papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), I tell her beforehand when our adult relationship (intimate) date will end, but I set a timer as a precaution in case I accidentally fall asleep. Still, I try not to let it ring by saying, “It’s getting close to the end time. Shall we take a shower and get ready to leave?” before it goes off.
Even if the timer does ring, women are usually fine with it. Once, it even went off while we were getting intimate, and I stopped, saying, “Oh no, time’s up!” But it didn’t kill the mood at all.
Some people might say it makes things feel too transactional or ruins the mood, but papa-katsu is basically a game of making the most of things within a transactional relationship. So I think setting a timer is one of the basic rules of the game for men.
That said, if the woman tries to cut the time short, that’s a deal-breaker. I’d say goodbye on the spot.
Other
I’ve never had anyone set a timer, but some girls are strict about leaving on time because of work or to manage their health.
If she’s important to me, I’ll plan the day around her schedule. And if paying for a taxi solves the problem, I’ll pay for the taxi.
I don’t know what kind of relationship you have with the person you’re seeing, but if she’s important to you and has a reason, I think you should accommodate her. If not, it may be better to look for someone else.
Some girls stay over, while others are fine taking a taxi home if they miss the last train—as long as I cover the fare, of course.
That said, if you keep encountering girls who respond the way she does, there may be issues on your end as well, so it might be worth reconsidering your own approach.
Other
Are you referring to women who work in the adult entertainment industry?
It sounds like you’re seeing them even though you don’t really want to. But don’t worry—there are surely women who’ll stay and share the afterglow with you.
Forget the women who leave right away and try making a new offer. I’m sure you’ll find someone wonderful.
Other
Unfortunately, I think the questioner’s appearance may seem too old-fashioned—or simply too old—for younger women to accept.
Try putting yourself in their position. Could you be intimate with a frail, unkempt, unhygienic older woman 20 or 30 years your senior…?
As a solution, I recommend working on your appearance. If you make the effort, I think women’s attitudes toward you will change considerably.
🏅 手コキ評論家
入会して8年。いまだ彷徨中です
Age: 60s
👨 Male
Universe member
Joe doesn’t have a lot of experience here, and I can’t say I’m particularly polished or sophisticated in the way I carry myself. I’ve also been dumped plenty of times. Even so, I’ve never had someone trigger an alarm on me. In a way, it might be a rare experience.
It may be risky, but perhaps you could consider resetting everything and starting over from scratch.
Other
I understand how you feel, but is being coddled really going to help?
I prefer people to be blunt with me, so I’ll say this: the harsh truth is that this happened because you’re lacking in some way. Rather than expecting the other person to make up for what you lack, it would be faster to work on improving yourself.
“Change the other person”? That’s one possible approach, but that’s clearly not what you were looking for, which is why you wrote this, right? lol. Seriously, would you be satisfied if everyone acted that way? Obviously not.
You do understand that this system of dating clubs isn’t a world where simply paying money guarantees you what you want, right? Aren’t you relying on the club too much? Maybe take a moment to reflect on that.
Other
Female member Potassium here.
So it really is just about the intimate part, huh... There seems to be quite a difference in how you and the women feel about it.
I get tired afterward, so my papa (a male supporter) usually spends about 10–15 minutes lying beside me and cuddling.
I like that time quite a bit—when he strokes my head, I feel like snuggling up to him. Once I’m fully awake again, we chat about all kinds of things and get affectionate. The pillow talk after the intimate part actually lasts longer.
There may be women like me at your club, so I think you should look for someone who suits you better. Sorry if there isn’t anyone like that, though...
That said, if someone’s body odor or sweaty smell is really bad, I couldn’t do it either. If you don’t notice any bad chemistry during dinner dates, you might want to take another look at your own body odor and appearance.
Oops... I guess I ended up sharing my personal opinion and my own preferences. My apologies, my apologies.
美惺（みさと）
?
Send a reverse offer to this responder
Other
I don’t think all women are like that.
At least, I don’t set a timer or rush off right away. Maybe they’re just not that into me…
🏅 倶楽部女性のご主人様に潤いを！
Mパパ、永遠の交際継続中！
B1タイプ〜A寄りパパです！
会う度大人は嫌と感じる方………ご相談ください。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe member
Can that really happen?
If that’s true, it sounds like the questioner is pushing herself way too hard… Is this for real??
But you’re already moving on to an adult relationship (intimate)…
Does that mean the sex lasts an exceptionally long time? Maybe…
If so, why not just meet at a hotel?
Or…
You could cut the time spent in bed down to a third—or even a quarter of what it is now—and finish properly during that time. Otherwise, it sounds like she’s not just unsatisfied with the current situation—she’s completely fed up. At the very least, shortening it might encourage him to make more of an effort to match her rising feelings, and finishing inside her sooner could boost her sense of validation, making the experience more satisfying and enjoyable for her too. Women can reach climax with as little as three minutes—or even one minute—of actual stimulation. But if it’s simply long, and she doesn’t know when the man is finally going to finish, she can’t time her own peak, and eventually loses the desire to even try.
I’m sure that’s showing pretty clearly… even in things like the alarm.
👨 Male
Universe member
You could always discuss today’s match in bed. It should be a fun way to pass the time... lol
Other
It’s not that this is a no-go at the club; it’s just that your particular partner isn’t right for you.
I don’t think you’ll get the afterglow you’re looking for from that person, so I’d suggest finding someone you’re more compatible with.
If it were simply an issue with catching the last train, you could just offer to cover a taxi, but I’m guessing that’s not really the problem.
Marika
Oh, I sometimes set a timer too. I occasionally fall asleep after being intimate. If it’s not an overnight arrangement, I have to leave and go home.
Other
Why not try telling them how you feel?
“I feel a little lonely when you always leave so quickly…”
The key is to ask gently, without making them feel blamed.
They may be able to give you some honest feedback—for example, that the allowance doesn’t feel sufficient for the amount of time they’re expected to stay, or that the date isn’t being planned very well.
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe member
Some women don’t leave right away, so I don’t think it’s impossible.