There’s a woman I made an offer to, and we had arranged a date.
This content is machine-translated.
Yesterday, the club contacted me saying:
“The woman is no longer available on the scheduled date. She says she can make any of the other dates you listed when making the offer—would any of those work for you?”
I’m still available on those “other dates,” but I wondered, “What should I make of her rescheduling right from the first date?” So I told the club, “I’ll reply soon, but please give me some time to think about it.”
Basically, I’m looking for a long-term relationship. What concerns me is that even if I accommodate her request, reschedule, and meet her—and we hit it off and start seeing each other, based on mutually agreeable terms—she might reschedule again for the next date, or become unreachable. I can’t maintain a long-term relationship with someone like that. If that’s how things are likely to turn out, I’m wondering whether I should just withdraw my offer now. I live quite far away, so going to Tokyo for a date is a significant effort for me.
The woman is very beautiful, and her profile at the club has a lot of positive things written about her.
Would you agree to the rescheduling? Sorry for the long post and for asking about something so minor. I’d appreciate your advice.
👤Asked byGuest👨GenderMale🎂Not stated👑Universe male member
If something like that is going to count against you, you may simply not be suited for dating through a club in the first place. It’s not very considerate.
I feel sorry for the woman.
Since this is a relationship where both parties have their own circumstances, it’s only natural to meet when it works for both of you.
It’s pretty clear that you want to be her absolute top priority no matter what. But that’s obviously unrealistic.
—Akari
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
Could it simply mean that the woman is on her period that day?
Why not ask the staff directly? You could write something like:
“I understand you can’t tell me the reason, but if she’s on her period, I’ll reschedule. If not, I’m considering canceling. Could you let me know whether I should reschedule?”
If they reply, “We can’t give you specific details, but we think you should reschedule,” I’d take that to mean it coincides with her period.
If instead they say, “We think you should cancel,” then it sounds like there may be another reason. In that case, I think you should decide based on whether you’d regret not going on a date with her.
That said, I recently heard that after FS and CS split up, CS started lying, so this kind of exchange may no longer be possible. If that’s really the case, I have to say the future of Universe looks bleak.
I’ve always assumed that most staff are basically honest, but when they can’t answer something directly, they at least give you a hint.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
I’d reschedule.
Even for a first date, something unavoidable can come up.
I’d wait and see. I often ask to reschedule myself, and unlike you, distance isn’t an issue for me.
Besides, since she’s a young woman, you should probably expect her to have more events and plans than we do.
If you absolutely need her to work around your schedule, why not offer a generous monthly allowance and have her focus exclusively on you? Alternatively, you could look for a woman who doesn’t get many offers and whose only papa (a male supporter) is you.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
I’d reschedule.
Even on a first date, something unavoidable can come up.
I’d wait and see how things go. I often ask to reschedule myself, and unlike you, I don’t have the issue of distance.
Besides, since she’s young, you should probably expect her to have more events and plans than we do.
If you absolutely need her to work around your schedule, why not offer a generous monthly allowance and have her focus exclusively on you? Or look for someone who doesn’t get many offers and whose only papa (a male supporter) is you?
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
Since I offer a higher allowance than other men, I don’t want her rescheduling.
I think it would be best to tell her on the first date, “If you reschedule, we’re done immediately.”
That said, if you offer a low allowance and still refuse to let her reschedule, your relationship probably won’t last with anyone.
Personally, I’ve never been upset about a rescheduling…
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
I’m the kind of person who doesn’t mind if plans get rescheduled.
Why not start over and call this one off?
The best way to decide is simply to ask yourself whether you’re okay with it.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
I generally only meet people within about a 50 km radius, but since rescheduling doesn’t affect me much, I’m flexible about it.
There hasn’t been any rescheduling for the first meeting so far, but all kinds of things come up in life, so I think it’s understandable.
> She’s very beautiful, and her profile on the club’s site has a lot of positive things written about her.
If it were me, I’d reschedule and meet her in person.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
If she’s rescheduling the setup, maybe it just wasn’t meant to be.
Women rescheduling is pretty common with regular dates, but honestly, I’ve never had a woman reschedule a setup or a first date. Probably…
Still, it’s really nothing to worry about. That mindset could actually get in the way of building a long-term arrangement.
P.S.
Also, since she suggested an alternative date that works for you too, I don’t think you need to consider it a rescheduling issue. She’s simply changing it to another day.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
Couldn’t you at least accommodate a rescheduling request?
It really makes me question your character.
If she’s beautiful and has an impressive profile, she probably already has generous (well-paying) papas. If you can offer an allowance even higher than what they pay—and you’re attractive and have a good personality—you may be able to keep the arrangement going for a long time.
If you can’t offer a high allowance, you’re better off not pursuing beautiful women. You’ll only be wasting money making offers.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
I’m fine with rescheduling.
Women experience much more drastic changes in their physical condition than men do, so sometimes rescheduling is unavoidable. I don’t think you can do papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) without understanding that.
Our only real weapon as older men is our composure. Why get all worked up just because she rescheduled? Composure is truly a powerful weapon—sometimes it can even give you an edge over the boyfriend of a woman you have a monthly arrangement with.
And if you absolutely can’t stand rescheduling, your only option is to look for someone who lives nearby. If she reschedules, all you lose is the hotel fee, so it’s not that serious.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
“Something came up” could mean work, feeling unwell, or even becoming a close contact, given the current circumstances. There are all kinds of possibilities.
They may feel uncomfortable saying, “I’m a close contact,” and if they suggested one of the other dates you offered, I don’t think you need to take it as a bad sign.
That said, if you still feel it’s unacceptable, continuing to see each other probably wouldn’t be good for either of you. In that case, why not turn them down and make an offer to someone else?
Personally, I think the best kind of relationship is one where both people are considerate of each other, whether the issue is work or feeling unwell.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
I’d be understanding.
There may be times when I have to ask to reschedule too, so it works both ways. I’d simply take it as bad luck that whatever came up happened to occur on the very day we’d arranged to meet.
As for whether it could lead to a long-term relationship, I don’t think you can know until you’ve met at least once. There’s no point overthinking it when you haven’t even met yet.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
It depends on how far you want to take things, but you’re probably right—it seems likely she’ll end up rescheduling the next date again or becoming unreachable. You won’t be able to maintain a long-term arrangement with someone like that.
If you only want to meet her once, that’s fine, but otherwise, why not leave it alone? Beautiful women already have plenty of men pursuing them. Hasn’t she been rated five stars?
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
