I heard that a PJ in her 20s whom I previously made an offer to had left the service. A few days later, her photo disappeared from my favorites. Is it possible that she’s still active? If so, can she restrict my account so that other people can still see her, but I can’t? We’re still seeing each other, so could this be something she did out of consideration for me??

> Is it possible that she’s still active on the site? If so, can she restrict her profile so that other people can see it but I can’t? We’re still seeing each other—could this be something she’s doing out of consideration for me as a PJ? There are several possibilities. But as everyone else has said, I don’t think you need to worry about it too much. If you’re still seeing each other, things will become clear in time. Until then, hang in there（笑）

Basically, you should assume that women usually have other men they’re seeing. If you want to have her all to yourself, offer an allowance that she’ll be satisfied with. Also, it may take years before she’s willing to focus on you. As time goes by, the number of other men she sees will probably gradually decrease. Ideally, one day you’ll realize that she’s chosen to stick with you exclusively. It won’t be easy, but give it your best shot.

Don’t you think you can have a wonderful woman all to yourself for an allowance of around 50, pay-per-meeting? At that level, 99% of the time, she’ll have other papas who want an adult relationship too. “I already have a wonderful papa.” I’ve never once been turned down with that excuse. Even if you were giving her 150,000 yen per meeting, from a woman’s perspective, having multiple wonderful papas isn’t a problem, so she’ll likely choose the path of seeing several men. So rather than worrying about whether you’re visible or hidden, calmly consider how much of an allowance you’re actually able to give the woman. You should have your answer within three seconds. If you’re giving her more than 500,000 yen a month and you’re also an attractive older gentleman, you might possibly have her to yourself. But even TOP GUN from Kobe—one of the top 1% of men, an ideal supporter who always gives at least 150,000 yen per meeting—has still had to settle for third place in a woman’s pecking order. Reality is harsh. The one and only thing you can do to keep her exclusively is to make her think: “I want to eliminate even the slightest risk. Losing this person would mean my life going completely dark.” In particular, be mindful of STI risks. I think it’s a good idea to casually let her know that infections can be passed back and forth even through oral sex. Whenever I’ve messed up, I absolutely don’t get intimate with my ace until the STI test results come back. That’s why my adult relationship with my ace has ended up being only about once every three months. I have absolutely no ulterior motive of wanting to get my money’s worth just because I’m giving her a large allowance. If it meant losing my ace, going six months without an adult relationship would be no hardship at all. You should also happily give your ace enough in return to make her think, “I mustn’t lose this person.”

Exactly. Mac is right—I’m just being overly self-conscious. He doesn’t think anything of it. A sad fact.

You can set your profile so that it isn’t shown to a specific person, so technically, you could continue using the site while telling them the considerate little lie that you’ve “left.” But whether they actually left or not is like snooping through your partner’s phone—it’s probably something you’re better off not looking into or knowing. Nothing looks more desperate and unappealing than possessiveness and controlling behavior in a papa-katsu relationship…

It seems like they disappear from your favorites immediately after deleting their account, rather than a few days later, so it may have been a considerate move—or a strategy—on their part. You can hide specific people from view. Perhaps they decided you were someone worth telling, “I’ve deleted my account—you’re the only one I’m still seeing.” Maybe they’re testing whether you’ll take advantage of the situation and offer less favorable terms, or whether you’ll appreciate their trust and treat them even better. Interpret it however you like. If they’re someone you want to continue seeing, then by all means, keep seeing them.

You don’t need to worry about that. You’re being way too timid.