Tips
Jun 21, 2022 19:38
11 answers
高橋（スタッフ）
?
Send a reverse offer to this responder
Other
I’m Takahashi from the staff.
If you haven’t been blocked, why not honestly tell them how you feel?
🏅 パパ活歴7年目突入
彼氏/既婚/他パパ/セフレOK/全力応援
Age: 50s
👨 Male
Universe member
Sometimes I also message women I used to see, as long as they haven’t blocked me on LINE.
If they didn’t want to hear from me, they’d probably block or hide my messages and ignore me. Since they reply, I assume they don’t mind.
In fact, although we’ve ended our monthly arrangements, I’ve gradually built up a pool of women who’ll still meet me on a pay-per-meeting basis and have an adult relationship when our schedules work out.
This whole thing is pretty interesting（笑）
Other
Maybe he had some free time, so he sent the same “revival spell” message to several women.
Could it be that he always hears back from women he considers more valuable than you, which is why things never progress to dinner?
👨 Male
Universe member
I’m voting for Taro!
I think you’re a little interested in him.
🏅 プロおぢ。ほんとはプロパパと名乗りたいけど名乗るほどの実力がない名古屋の汚っさんです。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe member
If that LINE message was just to remind you that “I was your first,” then that’s seriously creepy.
Even if you two were romantically involved.
> “When I told him something like, ‘I can’t meet because I got a boyfriend,’ he completely flipped out.”
That cracked me up 😂
I do occasionally reach out to papa-katsu girls I’ve lost touch with. Since it was a compensated relationship, I don’t really care whether we start seeing each other again or get intimate or not—I’m simply curious about how they’re doing.
There’s a girl I’m meeting next month for the first time in a year, and she seems nostalgic about it too, so I’m looking forward to seeing her.
Last time, she came on a little too seriously, like she was genuinely falling for me, and I backed off. But she’s a wonderful girl, so I hope things go better this time…
Other
Speaking from my experience of meeting a virgin through a dating club, dating her for several years, and then breaking up, I did feel a special kind of concern for her. As her first partner, I felt I had a responsibility to handle things well so she could go on to have a positive relationship afterward. I’d known several women who had a bad impression of their first partner and had become “second virgins,” so that was part of it. Even after we broke up, I found myself hoping more strongly than I did with other women I’d dated that she would truly be happy. So I can understand why he might message her on LINE from time to time, even though I didn’t do that myself.
As a woman, I think it’s perfectly fine to simply ignore him. If you’re genuinely open to having dinner together after all this time, then reply accordingly. But if it does lead to meeting, I think you should make it clear through your words and actions whether getting back together is a possibility or whether you’re only meeting because it feels nostalgic. Men sometimes meet out of nostalgia too, of course, but if he thinks you might still be interested, he may interpret things in the most convenient way and come on strong.
Whatever direction things take, I think it’ll be fine as long as you clearly communicate your feelings. Saying, “It was nice seeing you again, but I’m not looking to take things any further,” should be enough. He might be a little disappointed if he came expecting something more, but he probably won’t be devastated. You dated for two years, after all. As a man, he probably still feels that he wants to look out for you, and he’s likely also fulfilled by the memories you shared over those two years. So honestly, I think you’ll be fine whatever you decide to do.
—Taro
Other
I’ve never reached out to someone after we parted ways, so I can’t say for sure—you’d have to ask her directly.
In my case, some have contacted me afterward, but I’d only go out for dinner at first and wouldn’t jump straight into an adult relationship. There are also girls I’ve gone out to eat with for several months who never returned to that kind of relationship in the first place.
Other
You’re wasting your valuable time on him, so why not block and delete him?
Why are you even keeping the LINE chat with someone that weird? It’s creepy.
He’s checking whether you’ve blocked him, and when you read his message, he’s probably laughing to himself, “Is she still interested in me?” Don’t cling to your lingering feelings—delete him already. He seems like the kind of person who would bring bad luck.
🏅 あなたの味方
お役に立てれば幸いです。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe staff
What exactly are you trying to accomplish by posting this question?
If you’re not interested, you can simply decline to respond. And if you only want to go out for dinner, then just go.
So what’s the point of posting this here?
Other
I don’t know whether he’s aware of it himself, but I think he’s either hoping for a “one-chance” hookup, or at the very least wants a reply and some attention.
I had two or three people like that myself, and when I told one of them, “I can’t meet anymore because I have a boyfriend now,” he completely blew up.
Maybe I should’ve just stopped replying.
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe member
I think it would be best to ask them directly.