At Universe, men are expected to give women ¥5,000–¥10,000 at the first meeting, so I always receive an allowance from the men I meet there. But when I meet men through papa-katsu apps for a first meeting (with no adult relationship), I confirm the allowance beforehand and receive it when we meet.
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However, my friend says that she always gets an allowance when she meets a man, even without discussing it beforehand.
So I wondered whether I might receive an allowance too if I met men without discussing it in advance. I tried meeting several men without talking about the allowance beforehand, but, unsurprisingly, I didn’t receive anything from any of them.
I can’t get an allowance unless I discuss it beforehand, while my friend gets one every single time without discussing it. What do you think causes this difference?
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂Not stated👑Universe female member
It really comes down to the difference in writing skills.
I’m guessing your profile includes wording that implies an allowance is a given—without explicitly mentioning an allowance at all.
That way, men who understand the hint will assume you’re looking for an arrangement that includes an allowance and will reach out to you.
In your case, I don’t think your profile contains those kinds of keywords or phrases that only people familiar with papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) would pick up on.
With Universe, the agency sets the rules, uploads the women’s profile photos and videos, and even helps promote them through their profiles.
With an app, you have to do all of that yourself. On the other hand, if you’re good at presenting yourself, I think it’s possible to find a good man through an app.
That said, only a few percent of women are probably capable of doing that.
Your friend seems to be one of those few percent.
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I’m with Universe too, though I only tried it briefly before signing up (lol).
With apps, you never really know what’s true, what’s a lie, or whether you’re talking to a fake profile or the actual person! That’s why I ended up choosing Universe, which seemed more trustworthy and has a nationwide network.
That said, I do feel like your friend may be exaggerating a little.
A perfect success rate is pretty unlikely, isn’t it?
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I’ve never used an app. A woman once told me she had joined a club, and I was surprised, thinking, “Someone like her really joins one?” So I signed up myself just to see what it was like. Until then, I had absolutely no interest in papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan). She still tells me about what it’s like.
So, generally speaking, I don’t think generous men use apps or anything like that.
I think women are often casually approached with “Want to do papa-katsu?” even by men who aren’t particularly handsome, as long as they’re generous.
After joining, I was surprised to discover that this whole world existed.
As for your question:
> What do you think causes this difference?
Even at clubs, there are girls who seem to think, as soon as we meet, that it will be a one-time thing. But there are also girls who don’t give that impression.
I think that difference is what shows up on apps, ultimately leading to those kinds of results.
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I used apps before too, and based on my own experience as well as what the women I met told me, I think it comes down to the difference in men’s ability to judge people, just as Mac says.
Apparently, women who are good at using apps can tell from the messages whether a man is worth meeting, so most people get filtered out at that stage. Quite a few men apparently can’t even communicate properly.
Since it’s essentially a game of deception, there are women who cleverly dangle a carrot and then demand an excessive allowance for the first meeting, while men who’ve been burned by that end up trying to lowball the allowance for the first meeting. I think that’s how both sides end up becoming victims in the app market.
That said, there are naturally people who use apps successfully, so I imagine there will continue to be a certain level of demand for them.
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I don’t know you or your friend, so this is only speculation, but maybe it has to do with the difference in your appearance—or whether he wants to see you again.
I don’t know whether you’ve met him since that first meeting, but if you’re someone he’d like to see a second time and continue seeing in the future, perhaps he paid your transportation costs so you wouldn’t feel uneasy.
Or maybe your friend clearly discussed something along the lines of, “Next time, we’ll have an adult relationship (intimate).” Since I wasn’t there, it’s hard to say.
If you’d like to receive transportation money, you only need to ask about it beforehand. I don’t think there’s any need to compare yourself with your friend.
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