Is it really that difficult to find a woman who responds normally, is fun to spend time with, and has the kind of looks you like?

I’ve wondered about that too! From what I hear, men especially tend to complain about two things: ① She takes a long time to reply ② The sex isn’t enjoyable Apparently, a lot of them get left on read—or don’t even have their messages opened—for three days or more. I’m pretty attentive, so I reply almost immediately whenever I can, and I enjoy intimacy too, so I have fun with it (⑅•ᴗ•⑅) ② is something I hear often since it comes down to compatibility, but ① really shocked me! I was surprised by how common it is for messages to be left unread… P.S. I’m currently bedridden with a cold, so I’ll be signing off here~ m(*_ _)m

① Being able to stay in touch ③ Being my type Those are easy. ② Enjoying spending time together—that’s the key. Personally, I like women who speak casually with me, like a friend, so I spent my first year looking for someone like that. I found her, and we’ve been seeing each other for over two years now. If it gets to the point where she’ll rush over in the middle of the night when I’m really in trouble, tells me she likes me, and we have the kind of relationship where I’d even be willing to lend her money, it’ll last a lifetime.

I find it puzzling too. That said, I hear that matching is extremely difficult even on dating and marriage-oriented apps. In places where men’s and women’s ideals clash, I wonder if people end up divided into “the small number of successful men and women who match easily” and “the masses of ordinary people who become fodder for dating clubs and matching apps.” I imagine Marika is probably in the former group: one of the few women who are attractive both in appearance and personality, and can match with many men. From Marika’s perspective, she probably can’t see the world as men who keep pursuing their ideals only to be rejected see it. Likewise, she may not see what it’s like for women who worry that they receive no offers or can’t maintain a relationship with a man for long. And of course, dating is probably more enjoyable when you don’t have to see those sides of things. I’m enjoying myself too, lol.

You can find quite a few even outside dating clubs. There are lots of cute girls at men’s esthetic salons, and although I rarely go to lounges because I’m not much of a drinker, they’re full of unbelievably beautiful women. I’ve also found a monthly arrangement partner among lounge hostesses. And there’s one hairstylist as well. All of them are girls whose looks I’m attracted to and whom I enjoy spending time with. If I liked someone’s looks but didn’t enjoy being with her, I wouldn’t see her. As for the remaining factor—being able to reach them normally—I suppose it depends on how you define “normally.” A: Normal = within half a day (12 hours) B: Normal = within 24 hours C: Normal = within 48 hours D: Normal = within 72 hours In my case, most of them fall into categories C or D, and none fall into A. Maybe one or two are in B. Looking at that, you might think I’m being taken for granted, but I rarely contact them myself and we hardly ever chat. In fact, I want them to completely forget about me when we’re not together, and I’ve told them that, so this works fine for me. I want the women to live their own lives. I’m not their boyfriend—just a papa (a male supporter). Writing it all out like this, I’m realizing just how transactional I am... The biggest difference between me and other papas is that physical compatibility only accounts for about half of what I mean by “enjoying spending time together.” It isn’t a must for me. In fact, I have several favorite girls even though the physical compatibility isn’t particularly great. They’re my ace, my former ace, and my next ace. These three also receive allowances that are by far the highest. In other words, perhaps physical compatibility doesn’t matter if she’s exceptionally beautiful. That said, enjoying the conversation is probably a must. Everyone has their own style when it comes to these arrangements. I’m sure it would be even more fun if I could fall for the women I see, like Marika, Aya, and Aya’s papas seem to have. How can I fall for a woman...? I do develop an emotional attachment, so I take good care of them, but nearly half of what I feel toward every girl is paternal affection. I never genuinely fall for anyone. I’m starting to feel like something inside me is broken. I’ve forgotten what being in love even feels like. I’m seeing some truly beautiful girls, but I don’t fall for any of them. Of course, I don’t dislike them, and I do like them in my own way, but I can’t imagine becoming completely absorbed in anyone. Sorry, I ended up answering with mostly unrelated stuff, haha.

Thank you, everyone. Since Maezawa-san organized everything and numbered the points, I’ll use those numbers. As a woman, I feel that men have probably already cleared ③ by the time they make an offer. As for ①, I think most ordinary women can do that without any problem—over 90% of them, probably even more. The ones who can’t are either unmotivated or just a little unusual, perhaps? I imagine ② also includes things like having enjoyable conversations, sharing similar tastes in food, and having good sexual chemistry. Even after writing all this, I still feel like it shouldn’t be that difficult. Maybe I’m just broad-minded, or maybe my papas are particularly generous. For me, the biggest issue is probably finding someone whose schedule matches mine. Since men are the ones paying, perhaps they have stricter expectations of women. To the other respondents who are traveling during Golden Week and such, I’d be happy to hear your answers as well. Marika P.S. Thank you again to everyone who took the time to respond. I guess enjoying each other’s company really is more difficult than I thought. I don’t do anything particularly special, and I’m not young or especially beautiful—I’m pretty average-looking. But I think I’m naturally able to have enjoyable conversations with my partners, and with the men I continue seeing, I can fully enjoy an intimate relationship.

It was difficult—and still is—to find someone outside of a dating club. Dating clubs provide a lot of information upfront, so personally, I don’t find it all that difficult. Some women haven’t been able to maintain their arrangements, so it’s hard to say how long a relationship will last.

Even if you narrow it down to the basic criteria, there are still three: 1. She communicates normally and reliably 2. You have a good time when you’re together 3. She’s physically your type With a dating club, you choose someone from the women’s profiles and make an offer, so there’s a good chance you’ll meet criterion ③. That said, it’s only a possibility. Sometimes you meet in person and realize that although her photos looked great, she isn’t quite as attractive in real life. But if you meet her and have a good time, most men—other than beginners—will probably want to pursue things further. (Beginners often focus heavily on criterion ③ because they still don’t really know what to look for.) In this case, though, only one of the three criteria has been met, so you’re still at 33%. Once she also starts replying normally and reliably, you’re finally at 66%. Usually, things progress from there. But then you start thinking there might be a woman who matches 100%, so you make offers to other women as well. However, even if she meets criterion ③, she may not meet ②. Or she may meet ② and ③ but fail to meet ①. The reality is that it’s surprisingly difficult to meet someone who checks every box. And even if the man thinks she’s a 100% match, the relationship won’t work out if the woman isn’t interested, which makes things even more difficult. In reality, there aren’t just three criteria—there are usually many more. You may have preferences about what you like during an adult relationship (intimate), what you want your partner to do, and so on. There can be countless preferences even regarding intimacy alone. You might prefer someone with a larger bust, a slim waist, or beautiful legs. You may also prefer someone in a particular profession or with a certain educational background. Those are just the things that come to mind off the top of my head. In reality, there are many more.

In my case, it’s tough! I’m an old man looking for a woman who’s open to an ongoing relationship, so finding someone compatible isn’t easy. Simply being beautiful isn’t enough to make it onto my favorites list（笑）

It depends on the person, but since it’s a club where money is involved, I think many people find it fairly easy.

Since you’re making an offer in the first place, she’s probably already your type to some extent. I think it really depends on how much you expect from her. If all you’re looking for is someone who communicates normally and is enjoyable to spend time with, you’ll probably find someone by making offers to two or three women. But if you start adding conditions like wanting great sex, having an amazing time together, or matching sexual preferences, it’ll gradually become more difficult. Even so, I think you could probably find about one person by making offers to ten women.