Why do papas care whether a woman has a boyfriend?
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I’m a female member in my twenties.
Men I meet through this club often ask me whether I have a boyfriend. Is there some reason behind it?
Of course, if a woman gets a fair number of offers, you’d assume she has some connection with men, and I imagine most women would simply say they aren’t seeing anyone in the context of the arrangement anyway—so doesn’t that make the question pointless?
If they really want a woman who has neither a boyfriend nor any other papas, they could just choose someone who doesn’t seem very popular.
For some reason, it’s the married men who emphasize how devoted they are to their wives and how much they love children who seem especially concerned about whether I’m seeing someone.
I could understand it a little more if the man were single or a single dad, though, lol.
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂Not stated👑Universe female member
Some men genuinely ask because they’re curious, but those men tend to be the possessive type, so I think you can usually tell from the conversation.
There are also men who ask simply out of interest. They’re the kind of men who enjoy hearing about your boyfriend or other papas and appreciate it when you share those things with them.
With the latter type, I think it’s fine to speak openly. But with the former, the right answer seems to be that you don’t have a boyfriend. (Of course, even if you have other papas, you’d say you don’t—and give the impression that you’ll break up with them for his sake, when in reality it’s because of the generous allowance.)
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As another question pointed out, some people want exclusivity, so I assume that’s why they ask.
Whether it’s right or wrong aside, women are usually the ones who tell me, and I don’t particularly care either way. But if there is someone else, I’d much rather be told than be told there isn’t and find out later that there actually is.
If you’re going to say there isn’t someone else when there is, then I’d rather you keep it hidden until the very end.
As I’ve mentioned before, I’ve never tried to present myself to the women I date as a devoted husband or someone who loves children, so I can’t really understand how they feel.
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Since speaking is part of my day job, I’ll ask things like, “Are you married, by any chance? ^○^” But I’m not trying to find out whether he has a girlfriend or wife for any particular reason—I just ask as part of the conversation. Aren’t men the same?
Also, to be honest, I’ve tried both the “I have someone” and “I’m single” versions, but the result was the same either way（笑）. So I just honestly say, “No, I’m not seeing anyone” (*^^*).
But be careful, because you may end up with more men developing serious feelings for you (>_<).
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A woman with a good sense of how to keep things pleasant might say, “I don’t have a boyfriend ♡,” while others may take a completely transactional approach and simply answer, “I have a boyfriend.”
I think one reason they ask is to screen out women like that. But ultimately, they want to be with someone who doesn’t have a boyfriend—or at least can genuinely make them believe she doesn’t. So they’re also watching to see how she answers.
Another possibility is that they simply see asking a woman whether she has a boyfriend as an easy way to start a conversation.
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I’m only asking out of curiosity.
You do realize that just because a woman is popular doesn’t mean she has a boyfriend, right?
Personally, I’d be less inclined to continue seeing a woman who tries to hide it awkwardly.
It’s not like you’re the only woman out there...
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