I’m seeing someone on a pretty good monthly arrangement. She lives outside the city, so we can’t meet very often.
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We usually only contact each other when making plans, but I’d also like to exchange a few light, casual messages about once a week—separate from arranging our schedules.
She’s generally slow to reply to anything other than necessary messages, though she occasionally starts a casual conversation herself on a whim.
From a woman’s perspective, would it be a hassle to receive a casual message about once a week?
Also, what kind of approach do you think would be best for developing a relationship where we can chat casually from time to time?
👤Asked byGuest👨GenderMale🎂30s👑Universe male member
I don’t think you’ll seem that annoying if you message him about once a week.
Besides, if you only meet once a month, missing one meeting because of scheduling conflicts means two months can pass between visits. He might even fade out.
A little communication to show that you haven’t forgotten each other and are still connected should be fine.
—Marika
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If you meet at least once a week—ideally twice or more—you should be able to chat casually.
Since it’s a once-a-month arrangement due to the distance, and both of you are fine with it ending at any time, you already know that meeting more often isn’t really possible. Sending a lot of messages won’t make them dislike you, and they’ll probably reply at a reasonable pace, so just message them without overthinking it. I think it should be fine to match their reply speed after the second exchange.
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I’m always happy to chat casually~ (*^^*)
I don’t find it bothersome, but women have work, school, and private lives too, so I wouldn’t want to be messaging on LINE every day, all day ✩.*˚
I think casual conversation is a great way to get to know each other better, so I enjoy and appreciate those little, everyday LINE messages too ☆
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- The allowance is generous (at least 100,000 yen per pay-per-meeting arrangement)
- He teaches her about business
If either of these applies, she’ll reach out frequently—even just to chat.
In short, it’s about the benefits. If you’re a couple of steps ahead of other papas, she’ll favor you. It’s that simple.
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I also have someone I see on those kinds of terms, and we sometimes chat about casual things as well.
Whether she finds it bothersome probably depends on how she sees you and on her personality. The amount of the allowance may also make a difference.
In my case, I offer more than the going rate that sometimes comes up in discussions, and I occasionally send her digital money or online gifts too.
She’s important to me.
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