What is generally considered an appropriate level of distance?
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They don’t reply to my messages for about a week, don’t try to keep the conversation going during our dates, and turn down an adult relationship (intimate) with one excuse or another.
That’s how I’m being treated.
I’m not saying I absolutely want an adult relationship (intimate), but being rejected makes me feel really sad...
👤Asked byGuest👨GenderMale🎂40s👑Universe male member
I’m not sure what you’re struggling with, but if you make offers to women in dating types A or B, that can happen. So I think you’d be better off making offers to women in types C or D.
If a beginner suddenly tries to climb Mount Everest (Chomolungma), they’ll only end up getting lost or stranded.
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As other respondents have said, that isn’t an appropriate level of distance.
To me, maintaining an appropriate distance means having a relationship where neither person intrudes too deeply into the other’s private life.
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Haha! Your situation sounds like you’re being kept at just the right distance.
That means:
- He doesn’t contact you so often that it becomes annoying.
- Conversation during dates is lively and enjoyable.
- When you think one adult relationship (intimate) encounter is enough, he suggests, “Shall we skip round two?”
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To me, “keeping a healthy distance” means:
- The woman doesn’t intrude into her papa’s family life.
- The papa doesn’t interfere with changes in the woman’s lifestyle—such as marriage, getting a boyfriend, or relocating for work—and can send her off graciously.
That’s about the extent of it.
Unfortunately, in your case, he’s clearly taking you for granted, so I think you’d be better off ending things.
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I feel like there’s a certain distance between you—or maybe a wall of some kind.
Everyone has their own sense of personal space, and I think you and this woman simply couldn’t find a comfortable balance (>_<).
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An appropriate level of distance is whatever feels comfortable for both people.
In your case, though, it doesn’t seem like you’re comfortable with the situation, so it probably can’t be called an appropriate distance.
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That’s what you’d call an amateur-looking papa-katsu girl—the kind of natural, non-professional vibe many people are looking for.
She seems like a total amateur, which is perfect. That’s a true professional.
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At the very least, I’d say they’re keeping you at quite a distance, rather than maintaining a healthy amount of space.
It’s hard to define what a “normal” amount of distance is, but I’d say it’s when both of you communicate at a comfortable frequency, contribute equally to conversations during dates, and may have an adult relationship (intimate), while not interfering too much in each other’s lives—in other words, maintaining a relationship that is convenient for both of you, for better or worse.
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