Once something happens that makes me unable to stand someone, I end up completely hating them—even if they’re a papa I really like.
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I think everyone has things you dislike about them, but whenever I see them, I can’t help remembering those things. I can no longer fully enjoy our dates like before, and we end up parting ways.
How can I accept the parts of someone I dislike and still enjoy spending time with them?
I recently ended things with a papa I had been seeing for a year for this exact reason.
For me, whether I can tolerate something depends on how much I like the person and how close we are.
Everyone has different standards, but I feel the same way about women I’m dating and people I meet for business.
There are things I simply can’t forgive, and they make me dislike the person. But if we can maintain a certain amount of distance, it may not be enough to make me end the relationship.
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That may well be true of a boyfriend too. Why not try giving yourself a little space? If you feel relieved not seeing him, it may be best to end things. If you start to miss him, I think it’s fine to continue the relationship.
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That would be the same even if he were your boyfriend rather than your papa (a male supporter), wouldn’t it?
If you were married and had children, you might look for a way to keep the relationship going, but in this case, I think it’s okay to end things.
That said, if you keep repeating the same pattern, you won’t grow. Try to be more open-minded and kinder to others, and you may gradually change.
Marika
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Since this is about emotions and feelings, forcing yourself to put up with it or trying to find ways around it probably won’t help. I feel like it’s the same with boyfriends and friends, too.
Why not end things and look for a new papa (a male supporter)?
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The opposite can happen too—you may suddenly lose interest in a woman over something trivial and end things with her.
It’s not that easy to flip the switch, but if you want to continue the relationship, try not to focus on her unpleasant sides. Instead, remember the man’s good qualities, the things he’s done for you, and the good times you’ve shared.
No one stays in love forever, so there may be times when you end up disliking each other.
Even married couples can say they’re madly in love, get married, and then casually end up divorced.
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