Some men occasionally give me a bouquet of flowers on the first date—why flowers?
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I live alone as a student struggling financially, and I don’t even have a vase. I’d be so much happier if they added the money they spent on the bouquet to my allowance instead. I feel like flowers are a pastime for people with money to spare.
Even if it’s not flowers, I can eat sweets, and they’re delicious, so I’d be very happy with those. In fact, one man gave me some department-store sweets on our first date. They happened to be my favorite, so I was really pleased.
Why do men go out of their way to choose flowers? What do they want me to do with them?
I’m Aya, a female member.
I’ve never received anything on a first date, but it’s happened several times on regular dates.
My papa was extremely submissive, so I told him, “Wouldn’t it be a hassle to display flowers? I’m not really that type, so you don’t need to get me any next time.” He was absolutely thrilled.
I think it’s best to respond in a way that suits your papa.
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I’m Papico, a female member.
I didn’t realize some people don’t appreciate getting flowers (ToT)
Aren’t they cute and comforting?
I’d be absolutely delighted♪
A friend gave me some for my birthday once, and I didn’t have a vase at home, so I had to make a quick trip to the dollar store to buy one ⸜( ･ᴗ･ )⸝
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I’m Nana Ayase ♡
You’ve never received flowers before? How nice ♡♡♡♡♡
I’m certified to teach ikebana, you know.
Having flowers in your home is wonderful—not air fresheners, but a lovely fragrance that gently drifts by now and then. So beautiful〜
You’re definitely more into food than flowers, aren’t you? You need a few refined, graceful touches too.
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I’m in Seattle.
I understand how you feel. Flowers, travel, and spa treatments are things men do for their own satisfaction, so just judge him by the cash allowance he gives you.
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I’m Date◎Yume, a male member.
Haha!
I’m voting for Mac!
When it comes to flowers, I’d like you to take them home instead of throwing them away and display them somewhere…
It’s just a man’s wish that women be as delicate and lovely as flowers. So please don’t say anything overly practical, like asking for extra allowance or saying you’d rather have sweets（笑）.
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“Thank you!” would be enough, wouldn’t it?
He took time for you, made all those arrangements, and did it to make you smile, didn’t he?
Before saying this and that, couldn’t you at least say, “Thank you! I’m so happy!”?
Why the lack of thoughtfulness and consideration…?
As I was writing this answer, I started to feel sorry for you.
If you don’t want it that badly, give it to me! I’m the type who likes to regularly buy and display flowers I love, so I’d treasure them.
—Akari
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I’m Flag Maker, a columnist.
This is completely unrelated, but it reminded me of the lyrics to Denki Groove’s early signature song “N.O.”
Here’s an excerpt:
No school, no family
Not even bored, and no curtains
No vase to put flowers in
Not unhappy, but I can’t look cool
You should definitely give it a listen.
I’ve always thought that if they held a live show at the Olympics, Denki Groove would be the only internationally famous Japanese music group suitable for it. It would be amazing if they played a song called “Mt. Fuji,” but I guess people with skeletons in their closets can’t really do that in Japan anymore... What a shame.
The correct answer is, “Aww, I’m so happy ♡ Thank you ♡” You can totally just throw it away on your way home afterward.
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I’m Paper Airplane, a male club member.
I often hear the same complaint from friends who joined the club.
It doesn’t seem like these relationships last very long.
When it comes to women receiving money, all I’ve ever seen is them taking it and, as soon as the man leaves, sending it straight to the trash—at the earliest possible moment.
And yet, the men bring a bouquet of flowers every time…
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Maezawa from the CEO’s office here.
Back in the day, flowers were the go-to gift for women.
Men would wonder, “Why flowers?” and feel embarrassed carrying them over. But when the woman was genuinely delighted, they’d think, “Ah, so flowers really are the thing for women.”
I also feel like there used to be a lot of women who wanted to become florists.
> What do men want women to do with the flowers?
It’s not about what they do with them. We just want them to be happy.
When someone gives you flowers, it’s polite to show your delight wholeheartedly—and I think that’s also one of the keys to building a good relationship going forward.
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I’m Dai, a male member.
Bringing a bouquet on a first date is pretty old-fashioned—and he’s certainly putting a lot of effort into it.
I’d be a little put off too…
Sorry to say this, but he may not have had much experience dating ordinary women.
Since this is papa-katsu and you’re receiving an allowance, just say, “I’ll treasure these,” and take them home. You can buy a vase at Daiso for a few hundred yen.
After you’ve gone on a few dates and gotten closer, it might be good to gently tell him that he should probably stop doing that in the future…
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