People often say, “After we got married, my wife started getting really fat. It’s fraud, absolute fraud.”
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Whenever I hear that, I always think to myself, “That’s because you’re not capable of providing for her.”
In short, if a husband has enough financial and emotional breathing room, his wife can take care of herself with things like spa treatments, nails, and hair. And if he regularly expresses his appreciation for her, she won’t necessarily stress-eat and gain weight just because parenting is exhausting.
When I see a beautiful, cheerful mother at a school open day, I find myself envious, thinking her husband must really be a wonderful man.
I work full-time and have two children. Day after day goes by without having any time at all to spend on myself… Even if you’re the type who usually doesn’t cut corners when it comes to fashion and beauty, you end up like that when money gets tight. It’s heartbreaking. You start wondering what you’re even working for. And then your husband says things like, “Your waist and hips are really something.” When I look at friends in similar situations, I can’t help thinking that if their partners earned more for them, they wouldn’t have ended up this way.
It really does seem like the wives and girlfriends who are able to stay beautiful tend to have husbands and boyfriends who are doing pretty well, doesn’t it?
I get the impression that the wives and girlfriends of the men here are especially skewed in that regard.
What do you think? If you’re here, doesn’t that mean you feel that way about your wives or girlfriends?
I’m BB7, a male member.
Are you talking about yourself? What a sad question—or post, or fantasy—whatever it is.
I’ve never seen a woman who blames her husband’s lack of financial ability for her own unhappiness and still seems happy. They’re usually completely dependent on their partner, have a strong victim mentality, or only focus on the negative, I suppose.
Some husbands say, “My wife just keeps getting fatter and fatter. She’s a fraud, a total fraud.” And then their wives say things like, “My husband went bald and got fat after we married. He’s a fraud, a total fraud.” I sometimes think they’re two of a kind and perfect for each other.
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I’m Meg, a female member.
My husband always tells me,
“Thank you. It’s all thanks to you.”
And I reply,
“Not at all. As long as you’re healthy, that’s all that matters.”
But in my head, I’m apologizing with my hands clasped:
“Sorry we’ve been sexless, m(_ _)m”
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I’m Maezawa from the CEO’s office, and I’ll answer as well.
Thank you for your question.
I think one reason may be that once a woman has children, she becomes a “mother.”
She may stop seeing her husband as a man, and in turn, he may stop seeing his wife as a woman.
So perhaps that’s why some men come here looking for another woman, even when their wives aren’t overweight.
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I’m Taro, a male member.
There’s a cultural tendency among Japanese men not to praise the person they love in public, you know. And yet, behind the scenes, they may kiss before work every morning and have H twice a week. Many probably still feel genuinely happy, almost by reflex, when they touch their partner’s skin—even if she’s gained a lot of weight, had several children, become loose down there, or lost one breast to cancer—and may keep having H until she tells them to stop. Why does that work? Because they’re married.
Some mistresses do stay with someone for years and develop an almost married-couple kind of relationship, but they’re few and far between. In that sense, I think a mistress’s career is as short as an athlete’s. There are exceptions, like Kazuyoshi Miura, but they’ve put a great deal of thought and effort into what they do behind the scenes. The unfortunate thing for women like you is that many don’t understand this. It might be different if they had worked in the harsh worlds of show business or nightlife, but the dating-club scene is pretty easygoing.
Anyway, do your best. If you get lonely, come back here and let it all out.
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I’m Flag Maker, a column writer.
Since you’re going to live together, I think what really matters isn’t looks but what’s on the inside. If you choose someone based on their appearance, you’ll naturally end up seeing things from that perspective.
I can joke about my wife’s complaints and use them as material, but I can’t share my genuine complaints with other people. I wonder why.
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There are plenty of wives whose husbands earn good money but have no interest in them, so they spitefully spend lots of money on esthetic treatments and beauty—and have affairs themselves.
I also know husbands who say they’re worried their wives will attract too much attention, so they’re fine with them being a little overweight.
You have no right to criticize other people’s marriages.
You yourself must be married with children and engaging in this kind of activity, since you go to school observation days, right? Are you a married woman doing papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) because you’re unhappy with your husband’s income? Does your husband not value you? Or perhaps you’re a divorced single mother.
Either way, your way of thinking is far too bitter and twisted.
By the way, all of my papas (male supporters) say it’s been years since they were intimate with their wives because of their age, but they all still cherish their wives.
Marika
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I’m Paper Airplane, a male member.
You’ve reminded me how lucky I am that I can still gaze at my wife in admiration and follow her with my eyes wherever she goes.
Thank you.
Oh, and just now, my wife called me—in a very musical tone—“Useless~!”
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
There are plenty of women out there who aren’t particularly interested in beauty, or who may be interested but lack the motivation to make much effort. There are also women who simply have a hard time losing weight.
When choosing a wife, I think most people prioritize values, personality, family background, and so on over looks. I also get the impression that women who want to continue working and stay involved in society even after having children are preferred over those who aspire to be full-time housewives. At least, the men around me who are moderately wealthy or better have married women like that. One of my friend’s younger sisters, for example, earns more than her husband. Those wives don’t seem to work because their husbands don’t earn enough—they work because they genuinely want to.
I imagine that many women married to high-income men hold different values from the person asking this question and are living different kinds of lives.
Life is the result of how you live and the choices you make. Taking out your frustration on other people just because your own life isn’t going well is pathetic.
I’m sorry I can’t be kind to people who haven’t had their dick sucked.
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