I often see people on this Q&A site saying that if you don't state your desired amount from the start, it's practically impossible to get your allowance increased later.
I have the opposite view.
From the first meeting through the next few dates, I act demure and do exactly what the other person wants. Absolute obedience.
Then I tell him the heartbreaking story I've been keeping hidden and negotiate my allowance.
Since men are enjoying the sex and their brains are flooded with feel-good chemicals, they can't bring themselves to cut things off, so they all increase my allowance.
Of course, I choose carefully who I give this absolute obedience to.
I won't negotiate unless I have feelings for him too.
Have any of you ever gotten your allowance raised this way, had someone try it on you, or turned down a request like this? Any stories?
I’m Dai, a male member.
If she asks to raise the allowance, I’ll discuss it with her once, but if she asks a second time, I’ve decided to say goodbye.
Like Fuu, I’d also take being asked for designer-brand gifts as a reason to end things.
If she starts complaining about the allowance we agreed on at the beginning, I’ll move on to someone else.
I have no particular reason to stick with her specifically.
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I’m Date◎Yume, a male member.
I don’t have much dating experience, but I’ve never increased my allowance.
I’ve only had one arrangement so far, and once we entered our third year together, I lowered the allowance. Her response didn’t quite meet my expectations, but it wasn’t bad enough to end things—was I simply paying too much?
If she exceeds my expectations for the arrangement, I’m open to increasing the allowance as well.
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I’m Fuu, a column writer.
Hmm… I guess it depends on the person.
The person asking the question has clearly found success with this approach, so I suppose there are papas who are willing to agree to a higher allowance.
What Fuu looks for in a dating club is a safe, low-key relationship. Heavy personal stories actually turn me off. If someone is genuinely struggling financially and can’t survive on their own, I start worrying about what they might do in the future, and even an adult relationship (intimate) no longer feels enjoyable, lol. I prefer continuing with women who can live independently to some extent, don’t become overly dependent, and use the money for things like beauty treatments, hobbies, or a little extra spending money.
If they bring up raising the allowance partway through, I start sensing a money-money attitude and end things. I also immediately lose interest when Fuu is asked for presents. An allowance plus presents?? Why not just buy what you want with the allowance? How much are you planning to squeeze out of me? (lol)
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I’ll answer too—Maezawa from the president’s office.
At that level, it isn’t very helpful as a reference, so please be more specific. For example, what you would do in each situation and how you would steer the conversation. Feel free to write at length; I’d appreciate the details.
That way, I think more women might be able to successfully negotiate higher allowances.
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I’m Aya, a female member.
For me, there isn’t really any concept of negotiating in the first place… If I think of it as a negotiation, I tend to get defensive.
So when I genuinely like a papa (a male supporter), I gradually grow closer to him. Then, if we eventually develop an adult relationship (intimate), he may rent an apartment for me, give me presents, and my allowance naturally increases as well. That’s usually how things go.
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I’m Ayase Nana♡
I turned him down because I wanted a genuine relationship. He said there’d be no allowance, but he’d cover transportation and date expenses—and even provide an apartment.
Since I’m not divorced yet, I said goodbye to him.
I’m a little afraid to ask for more, so I can’t raise my rates. It feels rude…
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