At the first meeting, someone asked if I would agree to him finishing inside without protection as part of our future allowance terms.

> He was the same age as my father, but are men like this generally people who may have some money, yet don’t hold a particularly high social position and don’t mind if it affects their family life? Since others have already answered, I’ll just address this point. I’ve heard from others that men in the older age range tend to have a lower awareness of sexually transmitted infections. For some reason, they may have an unfounded confidence that they’ll be fine. This could simply be prejudice, or it might be due to the sex education they received—or the adult-entertainment culture of their time. Come to think of it, sex education at school doesn’t really cover STIs, does it? These days, there’s plenty of information online, so any man who actively looks into the risks should quickly understand the STI risks of having sex without protection. From that perspective, men who ask for sex without protection at the first meeting, despite not knowing anything about the other person’s sex life, probably fall into one of two categories: 1. They lack knowledge about STIs—or think they’ll be fine personally. 2. They don’t care if they contract an STI. Whether you feel comfortable seeing someone like this is up to you. Personally, if I were in the opposite position and someone asked me to have sex without protection, I wouldn’t agree unless they showed me their recent STI test results and gave me an idea of their sexual activity with other partners.

Are there really a lot of men like this at clubs? I think you’ll find roughly the same proportion on apps and dating sites as well—not just at clubs. That said, some people may have the misconception that women on apps and dating sites are more likely to have an STI, so they use condoms, whereas women at clubs are less likely to have one. Because of that, they may be looking for someone at a club who will agree to that kind of arrangement. So the ratio could be slightly different, but I’ve never researched it, so I can’t say for sure. Still, if it doesn’t align with your own views, you can simply turn them down. Men ask because they’re looking for women who agree with them, so I don’t think there’s any need to condemn someone just because your values don’t match. Of course, people have been warning for years that syphilis infections are suddenly increasing. That’s why Universe Club has partnered with services for partner health checks and online medical consultations—to raise awareness. So your instincts are correct. Even so, there are people who think differently, and I hope you’ll keep in mind that there’s no problem as long as both parties are comfortable with the arrangement. Of course, if a man agrees to use a condom—or if you’ve clearly said you don’t want to have sex without one—but then proceeds without using it, he should absolutely be excluded. Being sued for sexual assault would be a perfectly deserved consequence.

Some women may agree if you ask, even if you pretend to be someone else when posting so that you’ll get an answer. There are quite a few soapland workers who accept NN (sex without a condom, including ejaculation inside). Some work at establishments where condoms are required but still provide that service without one as an extra service to customers. If, as you claim, women were really contracting STIs or becoming pregnant that often—and if it affected their social standing or families—NN wouldn’t be this widespread. So I think people who ask about it simply estimate the risk of the woman becoming pregnant or of contracting an STI themselves to be lower than you do, or they believe the impact on their social standing or family is within a manageable range. And as Mac mentioned, women can simply refuse. I think it’s no different from asking how much allowance would be acceptable.

You’re the one who went on an overnight date in Kobe during a typhoon, right? Your age has somehow gone from your 20s down to your teens. Are you okay? Admittedly, going bare carries a high risk of STIs and pregnancy, so it’s certainly nothing to praise. Still, I’ll give him credit for stating it so clearly at the first meeting. The woman can simply say no. And I think men who bring that up at the first meeting are in the minority. I wonder if any women actually agree to it. Could he possibly be testing her—to see whether she’s the kind of woman who would accept going bare for the right allowance, despite the high STI risk? Maybe I’m overthinking it.