I’ve seen people here say that forgiveness is important, but aren’t there some things you should forgive and others you shouldn’t?
Is cheating something you should forgive?
I’m a woman in a relationship with marriage in mind.
I’m columnist Fuu.
Only you can decide whether the benefits outweigh the drawbacks. Please decide for yourself whether to end the relationship or stay together.
If your boyfriend makes a ton of money, you might be able to live luxuriously after getting married—and maybe even forgive him for cheating. If you can’t stand cheating, then find a serious, faithful man instead.
Either way, the decision is yours.
What’s interesting is that people talk about “cheating men,” but a man can’t have sex unless a woman agrees to be with him. So, realistically, for every cheating man, there’s one woman who accepts being involved with him, I think...
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If your husband is wealthy and you’re living comfortably without any financial worries, then if he cheats on you, staying in the marriage and forgiving him may be more practical than receiving a one-time settlement—especially if you don’t have the means to support yourself.
If you’re financially independent, you can weigh the emotional pain of staying together against the alternative and choose either to leave or stay.
People like Emi Kaneko and Yuka Mabuchi are strong-minded and admirable, aren’t they? Some couples also manage to make things work after infidelity has been forgiven.
Marika
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I’m Flagmaker, a column writer.
I don’t think the person who did something wrong should be the one telling the angry person that forgiveness is important. What matters is apologizing until they’re forgiven.
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I’m Dai, a male member.
Whether to forgive him or not is for you to decide.
You shouldn’t forgive someone just because another person tells you to, or because there’s something in it for you.
As you get older and gain more experience, you’ll usually find that you become able to forgive most things.
You’re probably still young, so you may not understand that yet…
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I’m Paper Airplane, a male member.
Um, papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) and love or marriage are two different things.
You shouldn’t cheat on your spouse. Men shouldn’t do it either—and getting caught is even worse. Actually, you absolutely must not get caught.
Your boyfriend won’t cheat on you either.
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If there’s an answer in this anonymous Q&A box saying you should forgive cheating, it’s probably referring to your papa.
Some female respondents have had their allowance tripled after forgiving their papa for cheating. That’s the benefit of letting it slide.
If the person asking this question’s fiancé is:
・Rich
・Handsome
then she has no choice but to forgive the cheating. Even if she breaks up with him, she’ll just start looking for another rich, handsome boyfriend—and men with that kind of high-spec package will cheat 1,000% of the time.
On the other hand, if she can forgive the cheating, she’ll become a “stable girlfriend” to that handsome boyfriend. She’ll be an incredibly convenient wife and financially secure for life. That’s the benefit of forgiving infidelity.
A loser of a man
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