I can’t take this anymore… It’s my 20th birthday, and my papa suggested that we exchange birthday presents around my birthday.
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I was totally fine with that, and I was planning to buy him something for around ¥10,000–¥20,000. But then my papa said, “I’ll give you a vibrator as my birthday present, so you give me a sex doll,” because he likes sex. I’m really hurt. I don’t want a vibrator, and why would that be a birthday present?
If this is a papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) relationship where having sex is considered normal, is this kind of present just expected?
I’ve never asked him to buy me anything besides my allowance. We do travel together fairly often.
I’m sad that this is happening on my 20th birthday.
Tell him, “What are you talking about? That’s about a tenfold difference in price!” and turn him down.
With a cheap vibrator, the difference might even be closer to a hundredfold.
Still, it would be good if you could eventually learn to brush comments like that off as if you took them as a joke.
But you’ve only just turned 20, so it’s completely fine if you can’t do that yet.
Please stay the lovely woman you are.
Happy birthday.
Marika
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Maezawa from the CEO’s office will weigh in, too.
That’s really sad.
It makes me wonder whether that papa was even being serious, because what he said seems so far outside the bounds of common sense.
That said, it’s also possible that during H, you went a little too far in making him feel good, and he got the wrong idea.
If that’s the case, I think you should clearly tell him how hurt you were.
He might genuinely reflect on his behavior.
You might also want to explain to him that being 20 is something special.
Hopefully he’ll change his ways and prepare an amazing gift for you.
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I’m Date◎Yume, a male member.
Haha（笑）
That’s a good question（笑）
In a situation like that, you could just lightly brush it off by saying:
“I’d rather have 〇〇 than a vibrator（笑）”
Then work on developing the skills to get what you really want.
Why not take this opportunity to see if this is how the tug-of-war between men and women works?
Treat your 20th birthday as the perfect opportunity for “self-improvement,” and grow into a smart, mature woman.
Make it a truly memorable birthday marking your coming of age and your move into a new stage of life.
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
Happy birthday to you.
I think the man simply got carried away and let his brain turn to mush. Even if you two have a casual sexual relationship, I don’t think that’s a normal thing to suggest.
You should tell him how you feel and encourage him to reflect on what he said.
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I’m Dai, a male member.
I use adult toys too, but any man lacking the sensitivity to give one as a birthday present is seriously out of touch.
I think it would be perfectly fair to tell him, “No wonder you can’t have a romantic relationship in your private life.”
She must have felt insulted after seriously trying to prepare something for him.
Not all men are like that.
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I’m Osaka, a male member.
Happy birthday! Sorry for commenting as a complete stranger, but forget about that weird papa and, above all, praise yourself and take good care of yourself＼(^o^)／
When I was 20, I was just a naive kid, so I think you’re amazing. Rather than living like a sheltered lab guinea pig, protected by everyone else, people who willingly dive into rough waters and face hardships will surely grow stronger!
The day will come when you can laugh about all this and turn it into a funny story lol. You’ll definitely be rewarded, and you’ll meet the right people!
Anyway, happy birthday~
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I’m Aya, a female member.
That sounds awful... I’d want to break things off too. I don’t use vibrators or anything like that. At least you didn’t end up spending 10,000 yen.
Why not clearly tell him that it makes you sad, and that you want a normal relationship? If that doesn’t work, I’d break up with him. It sounds like he’s taking you for granted just because you’re 20.
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I’m Joe, a male member.
That’s quite a predicament. Still, if possible, would you consider forgiving him just this once? I was one of those people myself, but it seems there are far too many papas who don’t really understand the meaning behind a birthday gift.
So if you can, try explaining how you feel to him. I think he’ll deeply regret it and truly reflect on what he did.
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Happy 20th birthday! ♪
Why not try asking Mack directly? He has a few lovely 20-year-olds, so I think becoming friends and celebrating everyone’s coming-of-age together would bring even more good luck your way ♡
I hope you find yourself a wonderful papa (a male supporter) ♪
— Makeotoko
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