I’m a woman in my 20s and currently seeing an exclusive papa (a male supporter) who wants to date just one woman and have me focus solely on him. Are there many women who manage to date several papas like this successfully?
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Most of the offers I receive are from papas with similar expectations. Given the limitations on my schedule and availability, and the fact that it would be difficult for me to date too many people, I’m thinking of narrowing things down.
However, the allowance is also important, so I’d like to make my decision while considering that as well as our chemistry.
I’d really appreciate hearing how everyone else goes about papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) so I can use it as a reference.
Also, from the men’s perspective, are there cases where they believe the relationship is exclusive, only to find out otherwise, leading to conflict when the truth comes out?
I’m a male member and a total loser.
Nearly all the girls I’m keeping around tell me things like:
“Are you cheating on me?”
“I want you to quit the club.”
“Please be my papa (a male supporter) alone.”
The girl I went on a date with yesterday has also been asking for a while if I’d get my name tattooed on her penis.
There are two girls who won’t let me use a condom, saying:
“If you cheat, don’t use one so I’ll know from the STI.”
And there are also girls who’ve told me they want to have children with me.
So please forgive all the possessive papas (male supporters) out there.
Men and women both want to have someone all to themselves—it goes both ways.
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I think the two people I’m seeing intimately both believe they’re the only ones.
Since I rarely have much free time for either work or my personal life, I don’t think they’re likely to find out.
I haven’t had any trouble with either of them so far.
Marika
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I’m だて◎ゆめ, a male member.
I’ve always preferred seeing just one person at a time. She wasn’t seeing only me from the beginning, though—apparently, she initially met and dated several men. But as things ended with the others—whether they cut things off or she did—it eventually ended up being just me.
Relationships through a dating club are a kind of contract, but if things don’t work out, you can simply move on to the next person. I don’t think it’s something worth getting into a major dispute over.
What’s more difficult is maintaining the relationship.
Of course, it depends entirely on the other person, but I think it’s best to discuss things openly from the start and build the relationship that way. In my case, there’s a 40-plus-year age gap, so it’s nothing like a typical boyfriend-girlfriend relationship. But once you’ve been seeing each other for a while, things become pretty comfortable（笑）
At first, she used to say, “I don’t want to hear that from some old man.” But recently, that’s changed to, “Yeah, I suppose you’re right.” I can’t help wondering, What happened to make her change this much?（笑）
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I’m Aya, a female member.
I’m in monthly arrangements with three papas (male supporters) who have said they don’t want me seeing multiple people.
One of them still has a five-year-old child and is closely monitored by his wife, so we can’t go on overnight dates. We can only meet discreetly during the day, about three times a month.
Another papa lives overseas, so we can meet less than once a month.
I see the remaining papa most often. He rents a place for me, and we usually spend the night at a hotel or at my place once or twice a week, plus take a trip together about once a month.
There was one time when we nearly got caught, but I’m good at deceiving both myself and other people, so I’m fine.
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I’m Flag Maker, a column writer.
I don’t know—it’s not really about that. I think it’s more a question of whether you’re prepared to accept a certain level of risk and commit to it.
I don’t think this is something that can be generalized.
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