I don’t want to take out my wallet even on dates outside of papa-katsu. I’m 20. I never pay in papa-katsu, but when it comes to regular dates, up to what age difference is it reasonable to expect the other person to treat me?
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I don’t even want to pretend to reach for my wallet anymore.
Maezawa from the CEO’s office here—I’ll answer this one too.
> In a normal dating situation, how much older does someone have to be before I can assume they’ll pay?
If you’re with someone of the same gender, I think it’s generally fine to assume they’ll treat you if they’re at least a year ahead of you or at least a year older, since they’ll usually act like the senior one.
If the other person is a man, men are generally expected to pay. So when you’re with a man, I think it’s fine to assume he’ll treat you.
In rare cases, it may depend on who did the inviting. If the man invited you, he’ll probably pay; if the woman invited him, she might be expected to pay. That’s probably a reasonable way to look at it.
(That’s separate from papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan).)
> I don’t even want to pretend to reach for my wallet on dates anymore.
It’s fine to assume they’ll pay, but at least in the beginning, it’s customary to make the gesture.
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I’m a male member and a total loser.
So I really can’t answer this, since I have absolutely no concept of “treating” a woman.
I always thought it was just normal for the man to pay.
I don’t want to make women feel like they have to worry about anything extra, so I discreetly and smoothly take care of the bill before they even notice. It never gets to the point where they have to pretend to take out their wallet.
I’ve never really cared whether they thanked me or not, but starting today, I’ll pay closer attention to whether my regulars are thanking me.
Honestly, what a pointless question.
More importantly, the other day Mac-san treated me to eel, and I was incredibly nervous. I’m not used to being treated, so I was breaking out in a cold sweat. I didn’t even know how to thank him.
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You really think you’re worth that much—or maybe you’ve simply overestimated yourself.
You have no manners when it comes to dealing with people,
and no charm either.
Without humility,
you’ll realize you’re completely hollow once you lose your youth.
It’ll be a shock.
Akari
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I’m Shingo Lee (Shingori), a columnist.
I think you should decide based on the other person’s value, not their price or age.
There’s also data suggesting that women who never reach for their wallets are more likely to cheat, so women who think they’re entitled to be treated will probably be cut loose by good men.
Men with a lot of dating experience or who know how to read statistics will quickly move on from women like the person asking this question.
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I’m Nana Ayase ♡
How condescending can you be?
It almost sounds like you’re saying, “I’m the one doing you a favor by hanging out with you.”
Even if someone like that managed to start a relationship, it would probably end pretty quickly~
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I’m Osaka, a male member.
So you’re saying that once you receive your allowance, you don’t want to put it in your wallet either?
People asking questions like that are what encourage free sex!
That’s not what I meant, lol.
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
If you don’t even want to pretend to reach for your wallet outside of papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), then shouldn’t you be looking for someone at least a decade older?
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