Is the amount I receive really a reflection of my worth?

I’m Maezawa from the CEO’s office, and I’ll answer this as well. > It’s considerably lower than I expected, so I’m shocked. Since the amount is something both parties agree on, if you feel it’s far too low, you should decline. If you turn it down and the other person simply ends things there, then, as you said, they probably didn’t feel you were worth more than that. But right now, I assume you’re probably just accepting the amount they offered without negotiating. If so, that means you’re deciding your own worth for yourself. From now on, you should tell men the amount you believe you’re worth, and decline if they can’t meet it. As for how to increase your value: You should watch the drama *Survival Wedding* from the beginning, even now. Every episode had some entertaining advice for women who sell themselves short. “I’ll tell you why men dumped you. It’s because you’re cheap!” “Someone might buy a Hermès Birkin for a million yen, but no one would buy a fast-fashion bag for a million yen. That’s because the price and the bag’s value don’t match. Just as they do with bags, men unconsciously calculate a woman’s value. Men spare neither money nor effort for a good woman. If she says she wants a present, they’ll buy her one; if she asks them to pick her up, they’ll go get her. On the other hand, they provide nothing for a woman they don’t really care about.” “In other words, you just need to increase your value until you’re like Hermès. Why can a Birkin sell for a million yen? It’s not merely because it uses high-quality leather or is handmade by artisans. Even if the same materials were used and the same artisans made it, it couldn’t sell for a million yen if it weren’t Hermès. Hermès never holds sales. Everything is produced in-house, and it doesn’t release outlet products. Production is limited enough that customers may wait a year after placing an order, which creates scarcity. Even the same item can have a different value depending on how it’s marketed. A woman’s value can likewise be raised considerably depending on how she presents herself.” “So how much are you worth? You don’t know the price, do you? Then how do men measure your value? Nothing has an absolute value. People simply calculate value as a whole. If someone showed you a gemstone and said it cost 300,000 yen, you wouldn’t know whether that was expensive or cheap. But if they told you, ‘There are only two in the world,’ or, ‘It’s 500 years old,’ you’d think it was cheap. On the other hand, if it were sitting in a cheap candy store, you’d think it was a toy or a piece of junk. The way we perceive something’s value can change dramatically depending on the scale we use to judge it. In other words, if attractive men are pursuing you, that becomes the standard by which people judge you, and they recognize your value as being high.” The Kelly bag was originally called the Sac à dépêches. When the American actress Grace Kelly married the Prince of Monaco and paparazzi pointed their cameras at her, she instinctively used the bag to hide her pregnant stomach. The photograph appeared on the cover of a weekly magazine, and the bag instantly became famous. The president of Hermès at the time obtained permission from the Monegasque royal family and had the name changed to the “Kelly bag.” In other words, the Kelly bag’s value rose because of who carried it. A woman who is with an attractive man is judged to have greater value. Louis Vuitton has never held a sale in its 160-year history. Keeping old-season clothing in stock creates inventory costs and losses, so most brands sell off unsold products, even if they have to lower the price. Louis Vuitton, however, refuses to discount its products in order to preserve their value—even if that means destroying them. Louis Vuitton could still make a considerable profit by selling items cheaply during a sale, but it chooses not to. “Do you like yourself? You must always show love to yourself, no matter what. Loving yourself doesn’t mean spoiling yourself. If you love yourself, you won’t want to waste your time, and you’ll work to improve yourself. You won’t hurt yourself, and you’ll take care of your body. If you continue having relationships that are only physical, it’s because you don’t love yourself enough. There are countless replacements for a bag, but there is only one body like yours in the entire world. If you don’t show yourself love, then who will? Love yourself.” To avoid lowering your standards for a marriage partner, compete in an open market like Coach! When asked, “What qualities do you want in a marriage partner?” many women answer, “Someone ordinary is fine.” But that “ordinary man” no longer exists. Most decent men are already married, so you have to lower your standards by compromising on income or targeting divorced men. That’s why Usami introduces a strategy for finding the once-in-a-lifetime marriage partner you want without lowering your standards! It’s the strategy used by Coach, the hugely popular handbag brand. Coach originally dealt exclusively in luxury products, but when the market became more casual in the mid-1990s, the company found itself in a difficult position. So Coach changed its positioning. “People will buy a luxury brand for 200,000 yen.” “But they don’t want to carry a cheap bag costing less than 40,000 yen.” Based on this feedback, the company noticed a gap in the market: no brand was offering bags priced between 50,000 and 80,000 yen! By repositioning itself as an “affordable luxury” brand, Coach quickly became beloved by a broad range of customers. Compete in a market where you can win! That was the strategy Coach adopted to survive. There was one more strategy that no other brand had tried. Coach listened to customer feedback—such as, “The pocket would be better here,” or, “This is the most convenient handle length”—and incorporated it into its products. Coach, which was extremely popular among young women, did this when it launched men’s business bags in Japan. The secret to Coach’s success is continuing to reform itself instead of becoming complacent. Find an open market. Thoroughly meet your customers’ needs. If you put these two strategies into practice, you won’t need to compromise on your marriage partner! And so on. There’s plenty more. The drama focused on marriage, but I think its lessons also apply to papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan). You should watch every episode from the beginning, even now, and use it as a reference.

I’m Dai, a male member. Saying that the money you receive represents your worth only means your worth in the papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) market. I don’t know how low this allowance is, but if you’re unhappy with it, it’s entirely up to you not to continue seeing him. Still, some women at delivery health services go all the way for just ¥10,000, so comparing yourself to that might help restore your self-esteem a little.

I’m Kamihikoki, a male member. Unless papa-katsu is your full-time occupation, the moment you’re doing something you can’t tell anyone about, neither women nor men have any real value. I think it’s better to focus on more respectable goals, like leaving papa-katsu behind or reaching a point where you no longer need it. If you have a respectable job and mindset, you can also look at it positively—as a nice bonus if you happen to receive an allowance from papa-katsu.

I’m Flagmaker, a columnist. Would you be willing to share an episode about an experience where you received a low allowance through the form below? Your story might be turned into a ¥10,000 Amazon gift card. [Announcement] “Flagmaker and President Kida’s All-Night Universe” https://universe-club.jp/column/all_night_universe We’re accepting questions and concerns about papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), as well as papa-katsu stories, through the contact below. Contact: flagmaker＠universe-club.jp ※ The submission deadline is Sunday, November 14, at midnight. ※ Please email the address above with the following information: ① Pen name ② Name of the submission category (Papa-katsu Questions and Concerns or P-1 Grand Prix) ③ Content (your concern, question, or fortune-telling request, or details of your papa-katsu story)

I’m Basil, a male member. About half of the women don’t even receive any offers, so there’s no need to put yourself down that much, is there? If you make a habit of thinking positively—for example, that it pays better than a regular job—you’ll gradually start to feel more confident.

I’m Kazu, a male member. The amount you receive doesn’t determine your worth. It doesn’t even determine your value in papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan).

I’m a male member and definitely one of the losers. I totally get this... That’s why I offer more than the going rate, and I only make offers to women who make me want to give 100,000 yen. I can’t imagine offering 30,000 or 40,000 yen. Of course, if we become close and she’s willing to agree to less than 50,000 yen, I’m fine with that. Come to think of it, I’ve never asked a woman how much she wants. Maybe I’ll try asking sometime...

I’m Aya, a female member. As long as you’re involved in the papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) market, I think it’s inevitable that you’ll be bound by certain attitudes and values. I spent a little time working at a club in Ginza, and whether a hostess was beautiful or had a more distinctive look, her value was measured by how much she contributed to the club—including sales and her ability to bring in companions. In that sense, I sometimes think papa-katsu is a little kinder, since you aren’t directly compared with other people as much. To keep receiving a high allowance consistently, I think you need to work on not only your appearance but also your personality, as well as have the mental capacity to handle your daytime job efficiently. That said, girls who focus solely on being efficient and getting the best cost-performance out of everything tend to have their shallowness seen through by wealthy men, so it’s better to retain a little awkwardness somewhere. You seem like a somewhat awkward person, so you may want to preserve that quality while working on your appearance. Why not start with something—going to a salon, getting cosmetic surgery, visiting a cosmetic dermatologist, or joining a gym?

I’m Saito♪, a columnist. Please value yourself. If you’re not satisfied with a low offer, don’t hesitate to turn it down. Once you accept an amount, that becomes your price. Even if it’s just once… I always let the other person set the price for everything. So if you’re okay with meeting just once, you may find a certain degree of happiness—but I don’t think it’s the kind of happiness you’re referring to.